Brielle

forty-three

BRIELLE

I stand in front of the mirror, running my hands through my hair several times. The same thoughts running through my head, if it was a good idea.

I cut my hair.

Not too short, but it used to go down to my back, and now, it stops just at my boobs. In layers, a pair of light curtain bangs frame my face.

I think I suit it, the woman at the hairdressers told me so, but they'll tell you anything. If your hair looked like absolute shit, they'd still tell you it looks good.

I don't blame them, they're the ones who get paid in the end.

Nona said she liked it as well, so did Ben. But my mum on the other hand, she grimaced at me, making whatever happiness I had go down the drain.

You know when people say you need a change when you break up with someone?

That's how I ended up getting my hair cut, it's not that it's terrible. It's just, different, very different.

I wonder if Gray would like it, maybe he'll tell me if he did. Or maybe he'd just walk past me and not speak like we've done for the past week.

The week where I dragged him into the janitors  closet and we shared a moment we probably shouldn't of had.

He wouldn't tell his dad right? He promised he wouldn't tell anyone, so hopefully he didn't tell his dad. Otherwise, I may be royally fucked.

I'd feel terrible bad for making him loose his future, especially since I broke up with him to ensure it.

Ugh stupid me, I really shouldn't have done that.

Anyway, Ben and Nona have been acting weird. Grinning at me when I look at them and whispering stuff behind my back. They won't tell me what, but it feels like I'm being ganged up on by most of my family.

Except from Dielle who sits in her room all day.

"Nice hair," Ben says, for the second time as he leans on the bathroom door. It makes me remember when Gray used to do that, and stare at me while I got ready, admiring me.

"Thanks," I smile, looking back at the mirror as I play with my hair. It's going to take a while to get used too, seeing as I was so used to getting my hand stuck in my hair if I tried to brush through it.

Now it's all short, and easier to brush.

That's a pro I guess.

"I know someone who'll like it," My brother smirks, telling me nothing. He's weirdly letting his stubble come through, shadowing his jaw and chin.

Making him look older with a beard.

I sigh, closing my eyes. He's been doing this all week, as soon as I put on my new pjamas it's 'I know somebody who'll like them' or when I do my makeup to go out- not that I've been going out much- but it's always the same thing.

I know somebody who'll like them.

Part of me's scared he's trying to set me up with someone more discreetly, but I can't move on that fast. Not when I'm definitely not over Gray.

Ben says his face is even worse, and he's offered for him to stay at our house again. But apparently he declined, because of me. Even though I was the one who told Ben to tell him he could stay on the sofa.

But I also told him not to tell him it was me who said that.

"Who?" I ask, gritting my teeth as Cardan runs at my feet. Smiling, I pick him up and cuddle him in my arms. Knowing soon he'll be to big to do so.