in my head

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proofreading my essay written in blood,
the wrong language, but you were all I had.
sometimes all the pain and the tears feel good,
dreaming daily- is it really that bad?

closing my eyes so I can hear screaming-
gone, but I listen for it anyway.
sometimes I hear voices, I hear singing-
the soft melody gets me through the day.

I feel alone and that's why I want it,
so again and again I trip and fall.
but all I'd want would be peace and quiet,
we're ignorant at the end of it all.

I wish I'd see you in my thoughts, my mind-
what's the best lie, but a love that is blind?

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