Delta [Epsilon #2]

Chapter Thirteen

"I said not to Turn, Epsilon. Can't you follow basic instruction?"

My brows scrunched in a scowl. I swatted his hand away, a bold move considering the warning glare he shot me afterward. "You know what? I'll just say it: that idea is bullshit. You can't just not Turn when you use Emotional Magic."

I didn't realise how stupid my words were until they left my mouth. The male tipped his head back and roared with laughter. 

"You're saying it's not possible? Don't you not see me standing before you?"

My cheeks burned, and I looked away. Of course, it was stupid to suggest it was impossible, especially when the male before me was living proof it was. Even now, I could see the emotional energy glowing in that violet eye. And yet here he was. Human. Unturned.

"That's different," I muttered, wanting to have some form of comeback. "You're seven-hundred-something years old. I became a werewolf less than a year ago. This will take ages for me to master."

I was right. I had to be right. The Delta, however, didn't approve. "Then you'd better hope to learn quickly." His words were low, edged with a snarl. "Because I know an opportunistic prick like Alpha South will not wait around for you to gather strength. If you want to save your sad little friends, this is where you start."

I resisted the urge to growl at him. I scrutinised him instead, but even as I did, I felt the pressure press down on my shoulders. Time... I needed time. Time that was slipping by my fingers, I realised. There were Southerners already scouting the Northern territory. Who knew who far behind Azriel was?

Pushing a breath through my nostrils, I closed my eyes and focused. Don't Turn. That would mean going against the animal instinct within me, the instinct of my magic. The instinct of being a werewolf. But I had to. Though werewolf form is strong, the energy is dispersed in the animalistic frenzy. As a human, that energy could be concentrated, released in controlled partitions and blasts. I needed to master this.

As I called up my Emotional Energy again, my drive melted in an instant as my body began to shift. When the Delta stopped me, I felt hopeless. How could I ever hope to achieve this?

We repeated the process for what felt like eons. It was the same every time; I'd call up my energy, determined not to Turn. But my will surrendered the instance my magic came forth, washing away any human thought or want. The Delta would nullify my magic, give me a sour glare, before repeating the process again. 

It wasn't long before the Delta had enough of me. After stopping my transformation for the umpteenth time, he gripped my shoulders and my eyes flew open. His gaze could have lit me ablaze, and some animal part of me cowered. 

"For goodness' sake, Epsilon. You're hopeless!" He yelled. His grip was almost painful. "It's not that fucking hard, for god's sake! Do you have no willpower?"

Any fear I felt washed away in an instant. With more force than I intended, I slapped his hands away, stepping out of his reach. "Then tell me how to do it, damn it! Telling me 'not to Turn' won't work, especially when I have no idea how to go about it!"

He pinched the bridge of his nose and shut his eyes, blowing out a long breath. It was as though he were talking to a child, and the thought itself infuriated me. 

"There is no 'how', Epsilon, it's just something you know to do. It's something you master." He gestured to me with his free arm, "And you're hopeless! My god, a baby could do better." He opened his eyes, deigning to meet my gaze. "God damn it, Epsilon--"

He never finished his sentence. The moment his eyes locked to mine, he stilled, and every hint of anger died on his face. 

I held his gaze, confused by the quiet disbelief written upon his features. It was then that I noticed the air between us had shifted dramatically, having gone from combative to deathly still within moments. I found myself counting my breaths, hanging on every heartbeat as his arms slowly dropped to his sides. Maybe it was a trick of the light, but he looked to be going pale. 

"What?" I demanded, self-conscious. Somehow, his being silent unnerved me more than his yelling. Had I said something to upset him? But he hadn't let me get so much as a word in! I looked at him, expecting a reaction, but it never came. In fact, it was like he hadn't heard me at all. He just continued to stare, his eyes wide and... afraid? The expression was odd. He stared at me as though I'd killed his mother. But what had I done to deserve that?

Then, as though it had never happened, he turned his back and shook his head. "You know what? I'm sick of this bratty behaviour. I'm not training you anymore."

I moved to follow, but there was something odd about his voice. It sounded almost shaken, with an undertone of shock and resentment. But then his words sunk in, and I found myself running after him. "What the hell? You can't do that!"

"I can!" he yelled, turning to me. I froze at his voice, and for the first time since me being here, he genuinely frightened me. A few beats of silence passed between us as he scanned my face, that disbelieving expression coming over him again. However, he was able to compose his face into some level of neutrality as he quietly finished, "And I will do what I want. Forget training. Forget it all. I want nothing to do with you."

Quicker than lightning, he whirled on his heel and stormed away. It took me only moments to recover, and for the first time in my life, I burdened someone with every curse word under the sun. 

My mother would have cried. I didn't hold back, and even those across the grounds turned their heads to see the commotion. I couldn't imagine the shock they felt at me cussing out the one guy everyone felt afraid of. They probably thought me to be suicidal with the way I hurled insults at him, but I didn't care. Surprisingly, though, he never stopped to fight back. In fact, his gait held some sort of urgency, as though he were eager to escape me. 

By the time I was done, my eyes were stinging. Futile. How fucking futile. He was my one shot at getting stronger, and now he'd left me in the dirt. How could I ever hope to save my friends now?

I sniffled, swiping an angry arm under my nose. Maybe he was right. Maybe I had been a brat. But did it matter? This wasn't just our prides at stake. This was a territory. A people. He was losing as much as I.

But maybe he wasn't. Maybe I'd overestimated his loyalty to his people. Besides, it wasn't like he treated them with respect. I looked again at his retreating figure. Heartless. How heartless. I couldn't begin to understand how one could be so selfish. 

Blinking furiously, I looked around, noticing the eyes on me. I didn't wish to cry in front of all these people. So, quicker than he had, I stormed across the grounds towards the palace, suddenly eager for my room.