Heimat

CHAPTER 18

His father had always refused to believe in the rumors about the prince, even with evidence. Seokjin did not believe them entirely too, his decision to decline Hanuel was not based on what he had heard about him. Okay maybe it was a little, but it was only a fraction. 

Majority came from his own experience around the royal and it hadn't been pleasant for him. The heir of the Kingdom acted like a brat and so fucking entitled, it repelled him. No wonder not many people were fond him like the King.

"But this is the question of my life. This is the question of my happiness. And it's not like we are poor and our condition is not so desperate that I must marry him. Appa please try to understand that all that wealth would not bring me happiness. I will get what I want but at what cost? My freedom! I won't be able to visit you whenever I like, do what I like and I wouldn't even be allowed to step out of the palace much. I do not want to be bound by invisible chains. 

I want to care for my people openly. The most important thing I am looking for in my marriage is the emotional availability of my mate. I want him to be there for me, to be able to juggle his job with his home. I want him to love me for who I am and not for my face or body. And there is no guarantee that the prince can provide it. I cannot decide a person's personality by their social status. I will be the queen but I will not be a happy one and an unhappy queen can never perform the best for the subjects. I do not want that to happen to me. T

he lifestyle just doesn't suit me. I am thankful about the fact that you have given me a choice and want you to understand that whoever becomes my mate will be the one I will be ready to spend eternity with. I understand that you want the best for me, so please promise me that you will accept and at least try to understand my decision".

His father nodded, a small smile playing on his lips. "I understand my dear. And it delights me to know that you have such an approach towards this. Still I urge you to think about it once again and don't worry, I am confident now that you are aware of your needs and what you seek in a bond. I promise to understand your choice when you make one". He placed a comforting kiss on his son's forehead, tears suddenly welling up in his eyes, realizing how much his Seokjin had grown.

He regretted the fact that he was largely unavailable during his childhood and wondered if things would have been different if he would have made an effort to create a bond with his omega son like his wife did. It was obvious that Seokjin was hiding something from him. The moment he had suggested the idea of marriage, the omega seemed anxious, declining to get married just yet.

Whether he was against the idea of getting married or getting married to someone else will be revealed soon.

XXX

"I understand why you did that now Kim" Seokjung muttered. Namjoon did not reply, throat thick with emotion. "What do you plan to do now? Forget that my brother ever existed in you life and move on?", Seokjung questioned. "I'm going to talk to father once again. I hope he would change his mind, convince him somehow. How is Jin?"

"It was quiet a blow that you landed on him. He yelled how much he hates you and threw a fit when he reached home. He has locked himself in his room, barely coming out and crying most of the time I think. I heard him through the door. You were pretty harsh on him", Seokjung answered recalling the incident that happened at home the night after their father proposed Seokjin met his suitor. 

"I'm sorry", that's all he could say for now.

"Say that once again and I will smack you. Apologize to Seokjin instead. You broke his trust. You proved your worth to me, don't make me reconsider it Kim", he said getting up to leave.

"I know that you both are hurting, and that you both love each other. As much I don't want to admit it but it is decided that no matter how many times Seokjin says he hates you, he's always going to love you. And you better hurry up and clear it out before the person you love is taken away by someone else".