The Gold of the Firepines

La Bataille En Route (Part 2)

First shot fired was just that: fire- from BLU.

It was a good think Ms. Pauling was such a defensive driver. She swerved her car just in time, the RED team falling over to the left on top of one another. "This is why seatbelts save lives!" Medic smiled, the only one who stayed securely where he was.

"Indeed, however they restrict you from doing this..!" Soldier rolled down the window and reached out with his rocket launcher.
Soldier's timing - even if he couldn't see it, couldn't have been better - the grenade BLU Demoman threw, knocked perfectly into the launcher and sent it back into their van.

There was an outburst of panic as it flew through the van and out another window to the far right, blowing up right outside. Or rather, a couple however-many feet from outside as both vehicles seemed to only be picking up in speed.

"See that! I didn't even fire and I have them scrambling!" Soldier chuckled and went to finally pull his trigger...only to have it followed by a click. "Huh-? I didn't load it! I knew I was forgetting something..."

"Nevermind that!" Spy snipped a little, "I can take my own shot-"
"Don't think so, mate. I was preparin' my shot first." Sniper said, needing to lower his rifle.

Spy sneered. "As if you could get a steady shot from here- you can't even properly rest that rifle!"

"I'd be able to if you got your bloody arse out the way and quit leaning in my space! I'm the Sniper. I can snipe."

"I am not leaning in your space; I am the only one trying to make a wise shot-"

"Oh my god, both of you cut it out..!" Ms. Pauling was getting tired of their borderline old-married-couple sounding argument...well, as old-married-couple-esque trying to aim out of a window with guns sounded.

A syringe flew by, disrupting their petty squabble for good, and put them both leaning back in their seats. It barely missed Ms. Pauling- the life flashing before her eyes slapped on her face.
"Maniacs-! Don't aim for me..!" Ms. Pauling snapped, shouting at the other vehicle, even if the chances of any of them hearing her were low.

"Yeah..! What's the matter with you?!" Scout followed up, as if his voice could be heard any clearer.

The BLU Bostonian did the complaining to the BLU Medic within their vehicle of course- "Watch it..! You almost hit Ms. Paulin'!" He protested. "You should just focus on drivin' and gettin' us there first!"

"I know that." BLU Medic hissed like a tired soccer mom. "Go find something more useful to do instead of criticising how I do things, would you?"

BLU Scout didn't have time to ask what a more useful thing would be, before he saw his chance.

"What are they doing- Pyro, what are you doing?!" Pauling said, eyes glued on the road and going side to side between mirrors, catching a glimpse of Pyro pushing past Demoman, crawling over seats, and climbing out the window.
Pyro didn't answer, too busy making their way through, though none of RED tried stopping them. "Pyro..!" Ms. Pauling tried again, but too late.

Giving a battle cry, as they were far enough out, they jumped out of the moving car and onto the roof of BLU's van.

"They've lost it..!" Demoman commented but then beamed like a proud parent at a middle school sports event. "Atta lad! Get up in there!"

"I don't think so, buster-" BLU Scout popped out the sunroof, the trip to the top of the van much easier than what Pyro had. He took off his hat and tossed it back in the van before the wind of however-many-hundred-miles-per-hour could claim it.
"No RED allowed on this ride." He readied his bat and took a first step over, Pyro keeping their feet planted. Of course, immediately after taking the first step, intimidation from their statement was lost when BLU Scout nearly slipped off. BLU Heavy popped out the top of the sunroof in just enough time to catch and restabilize him.