Untangling Strings

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Gab and I drove around town after the heart to heart and mind to mind conversation in the kitchen. He suggested I need a breather which isn't a bad idea at all.

"You want ice cream?" his voice filled the air.

"Will it be your treat?" I really have to keep tight on my savings.

"Yeah, tell me what else you want. I'd buy anything just to make my sister smile," he looked at my direction for a second and returned to the road. "You deserve the world. Maybe not the world I tried to build when we were younger, but the world you desire."

Those words touched my heart in the most tender way. Am I really deserving? "Ice cream and acrylic paints would be an incredible duo."

We were sitting in the park, wallowing in the Buttered Pecan ice cream we both love, and a bag of paints between us. "Thank you," I murmured. "This means a lot."

"I'm just always here for you." Both of us were looking elsewhere, basking in the beauty of nature.

"I think..." I paused for a second mustering up the courage to say the truth.

"Go on, I'm all ears."

"You're here, for me. But we haven't had a reality check. We're here, but not the same anymore. Time did change us, Gab. Us, the way we are towards each other, the bond, it's all there but different."

"Mm, that was the hard truth I had to swallow when I saw you back in the city. I keep on fooling myself."

"I have to let you go."

His whole face was filled with shock, "What are you talking about?"

"Since your wedding, I still clung to my brother whose number one priority is me. I wasn't thinking straight and that's the root cause why I always feel defeated whenever you take Avery's side. It was hanging in front of my face all along yet I chose to ignore it because the thought of losing you spins my head in three sixty degrees."

"Whatever happens, whoever adds up to my life, you will always be my sister. And I agree with you. When you left for Greenwoods, I almost lost my sanity the morning I found out, and there I knew I had to let you go ‒the old you. And I must welcome the Hope you are now."

"Can you remind me who I am?"

"Before, you were my most protected possession that I had to lock in my arms because I thought the cruel world doesn't deserve you. Now, you belong to no one but yourself and are capable of walking on the world's runway." He finished his ice cream and stared at me, "It's breaking my heart that you no longer need me as much back then, but at the same time I'm beyond proud of you."

"There's nothing to be proud about."

"You've been through a lot yet you're still standing on your feet. May seem absurd, but it amounts to something."

"I wish I could see things your way. You know how much I wanted to be exactly just like you. Ever since."

"No," he forced a smile. "Don't say that."

"Being your only sibling, people always see the difference. And I do too. You're too kind while I have a shitty attitude, you never curse, always have the perfect words to say, doing things right, and don't get me started on how freaking brilliant that head of yours works because I planned to crack your head when I'm seven to steal your brain."

He threw a fit of laughter, "You never would."

"You thought so? Because I sneaked into your room once, you were asleep, and I had a scissor. I just couldn't figure out where to start cutting you open." It was true, I have envied him before until now. I feel like I would never measure up to him yet I can't completely hate him because he'd done all good things for me.

"You would never want to be me." I shoot him a confused look. "A life with years of being bullied as a student, having a teetering marriage, and much more."

"We all really have it worse, don't we?" he nodded in agreement. "Where do you think I should start?"

"Wherever your heart is," he stood up and offered me his hand which I grabbed without hesitation. The hand that has been holding me since day one, supported me as I grew up, comforted me in my lows, led me towards my first step into the real world, and now ready to let me go and wave from afar. I always wonder if I have three parents, and because society wouldn't accept that they make-believe Gab is my brother.

"Just so you know, I curse, just not in front of you."

"Gentleman, indeed."

He escorted me into the passenger's seat, and before he started the ignition, words just spilled from my mouth "Hey, can you tell me about the bullying and divorce?"

"If you'll start painting again."

"Great deal."