ʟᴏꜱᴛ ʟᴏᴠᴇ

51

Going away was a big step for me, I had to figure out legal living arrangements for Zion, Mikah and Jordan. Conjure up the money to actually go and that was if I even got accepted.

I obviously thought about staying, but something in me longed for more than just what was here. I wanted to do something, make a name for myself.

I felt his large hands grip my waist and pull me on top of him, straddling him in a way where I could bury my head into his white tee. He cradled my head in his hands, stroking my hair. My head bobbed with every sniff, gasp and hitched breath.

I pressed myself against him, trying to grasp his presence while I could.

The pit in my stomach ached me, ached me so god damn bad.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, fiddling my thumbs over the peach fuzz on the back of his neck.

He guided my chin up, lifting my head up to face his. I sniffed back, blinking my eyes to get rid of the initial tears.

"Promise me this?" He asked.

I nodded, pressing my cheek to his shirt to dry my damp cheeks.

"Mhm." I nodded.

His hand slid down my hair, smoothing the baby hairs down. He gazed down at me with pure sorrow and astonishment.

"No more tears after this, these months are gonna be happy, okay. Please, please." He begged. I could sense the pain in his voice, all he wanted was for us to spend these last months happy.

"Okay." I was able to choke out.

He rested his back against the headboard, widening his legs for me to shimmy between. I rested my cheek on his chest, hearing his heartbeat as it sent vibrations throughout my body.

"Can we just like.. stay like this?" I spoke.

I didn't need to hear his response, I felt his arm extend outwards and pull the string on the lamp before the complete darkness engulfed us.

He stroked my hair until he fell asleep. I listened to his uneven breaths before falling deep into slumber myself.

"Hi."

"Hey." I opened the door wider to let him in as he sat on a chair at the table. I took my time closing the deadbolts until turning around.

"I'm sorry." I blurted, sitting in the chair across from him.

He took his shoes off but kept on his jacket.

"Why?"

"I'm sorry for making you feel the way you did, I should've known."

"I should've told you, you wouldn't have known. I'm sorry, for acting the way I did, I was irresponsible and should've been thinking. I'm sorry for what I put Rylan through, for what I put.. you through."

He shook his head in embarrassment before pinching the bridge of his nose with a wince.

"I shouldn't have read your diary either, that was your property and the stuff in there is not my business to share."