Like a Puppet on a String

The Junk Arms

The Junk Arms is situated on the corner of Bottletop Avenue and Earbud Road, right in the centre of Junk Town. As expected at that time of night, it was quiet apart from a few regulars. Or more accurately, a few chronic alcoholics. I recognised good old Darrin Plenty slumped over a high stool at the bar. Darrin looked terrible. We'd be seeing him down at F n' G soon. Qwendy, the elderly barkeep greeted us with a wave.

"Good to see ya, gents," she said. "Long time no see, Mr Fleishman."

Bruce returned her greeting with a tired wave before plonking down in a corner booth. I ordered two double whoskeys and joined him.

"C'mon, shake out of it, Bruce," I said. "All's well that ends well. We got the job done, we got out safe and sound and we're gonna get paid. Boss Goon is good like that."

He looked up at me and took a sip from his glass, "Yeah, yeah, you're right." He laughed a little, the colour starting to return to his cheeks. "Maybe I should get out of the office a little more. I'm getting soft." He playfully prodded the belly that spilled copiously out over the rim of his trousers.

"That's the spirit," I laughed, draining my glass and nodding to Qwendy for another. "Now, let's talk about something else. Take our mind off tonight. I wonder how the sports went." I took out my datapad and left it on the table. Fleishman peered at it and pointed at the flashing "new message" icon.

"You've got a mail from the folks at Junkland Deaths and Marriages. What's it say?"

"Not now, Bruce," I said, annoyed. "Forget about work. Hey, I wonder how the Trashers got on." I started to scroll to the sports scores but I was too late. Bruce took out his own datapad out and before I could stop him, opened up the message.

"Strange," he said. "Since when do Deaths and Marriages work a 24 shift?"

"Leave it, Bruce!" I pleaded, sensing something wrong. He ignored me and started to read.

"Dear Fleishman and Graves Ltd. Following allegations made by a Mrs Philomena Goon regarding the handling, disposal and reporting of body and/or body parts by your company contrary to the rules and guidelines of same, I hereby revoke, with immediate effect, your undertaking and embalming licence (and all associated benefits). You have ten (10) days to appeal this decision. With Joyful Good Wishes, Leonard Mangle, Director, Deaths, Marriages and Catastrophes."

The glass fell from my hand. There was no ambiguity. There it was in black and white. Plain as the nose on my face. Our licence was gone. Fleishman sat and stared at me like a child who's just dropped their ice cream. Fleishman and Graves were out of business. Mrs Goon had shut us down.

The news hit us both like a brick to the head. Quickly, we decided we needed sleep and headed home. The plan was to get some shut-eye and tackle the problem with a fresh mind in the morning.