Jaded

[48] How Hungry?

"How insane can they possibly be? I don't mind paying a little more-"

"$45 for a burger."

I pause mid-sentence, lips parted in an unpleasant mix of shock and horror. Quietly, I ask, "combo?"

He shakes his head, giving me a somber look.

Oh lord.

"That much for a burger?! Is it stuffed with gold?!"

"No, just lettuce."

Atty narrows his eyes and whispers, "I've seen the burgers, they're really tiny." He then proceeds to slouch more, towards me, and rests his head on my shoulder- groaning yet again.

Looks like Atticus is finally running out of steam. It's kind of cute actually, the way he's so docile right now. Instinctively, I reach out with my other hand and ruffle his soft hair.

Right across from us, amongst the dense cluster of excited families, and eager teenagers, I spot a lady. She's dressed in an emerald green two-piece carnival costume, complete with the vivid feathers and accessories. She's absolutely breath-taking, with her long legs and contagious smile. Though I'm not sure if it's technically okay for her to wear that, considering the kind of carnival this is. Oh well.

"What I would give to see you in that," I comment, gesturing to the woman.

"Her outfit? The two-piece?" Atty asks, incredulous. He immediately sits up, eyebrows raised.

When I nod, Atty chuckles. He dramatically taps his chin and knits his eyebrows, as if he's seriously considering it. Then he shakes his head and envelopes both my hands in his, speaking in a gentle tone, "my dear, I think I'd have trouble filling it out."

I burst into laughter, putting in the effort to not drop my food. "Nonsense. Absolute lies. Have you seen your ass?"

Atty shakes his head again. "No, it's behind me."

"And anyways," he continues, gesturing to his chest, "I meant the top." Atty pauses for a bit before sporting a mischievous grin, the kind that brings out the rare bouts of chaos in his eyes. "You, on the other hand-"

"You have to earn that." A complete lie, I'd love to wear that for him. 

Atty nods in agreement and points to the puke area again. "Fair enough. How about seeing you in that, then?"

Near the trio of carnival workers, there's a person dressed in a hot dog costume waving around a sign. He, or she, is handing out flyers to passerbys while squeezing in a little dance every now and then.

"Joke's on you, smartass, I already wore that in the summer before 8th grade, it was my first job at Aunty Fran's store."

Offhandedly, I add, "it was such an awful time too, I lost a bet to my cousin- Etta, of all people. Then I didn't do what I promised to, because even I wasn't crazy enough to lick the toilet. As revenge she drew a mustache on me right before school started- with permanent marker."

"Of course," I continued, "the world of pain Aunty Fran put Etta in was comparable to the world of shame Etta put me in that first week of school. Kids called me hay-stache for a few months. And while I agree that it was clever, joining my last name, Hayes, with the word mustache to make it sound like 'haystack,' it was still annoying."

Atty laughs so hard he wheezes and has to take a moment. When he finally pulls himself together, he says, "I need to see that."

"No way, never."

Eighth grade me wanted braids in her hair everyday, but also did not know how to braid, had the total inability to learn, and insisted she didn't need Mama's help. The result? A disaster.

"Funny how you think I'm asking you."

Huh?

I notice the phone in his hands too late. By the time I've lunged towards it, he's already hit dial. Atty presses his palm against my forehead, holding me back as it rings. I know exactly what he's up to, no way in hell I'm letting him succeed.

Unfortunately, Mama picks up right away. Doesn't she have an oven to attend to? A store to run? Where's dad when you need him. 

I can hear her voice singsong from the phone. She greets Atty with a loud "Atticus! Sweetie, how are you?"

Despite my struggling, and constant background chatter of "Mama, don't do it," it's only a matter of mere minutes until catastrophe.

Atty is now clutching his phone tightly, with a picture of my badly braided, moustache-stained self saved in his favorites folder, and is laughing so hard he has to place a hand on his stomach.

Wasn't he hungry just a short while ago? So hungry he was melting into mush and complaining, ready to eat even cotton candy? 

Which reminds me.

"Speaking of hotdogs," I say, "I think there's an all-you-can-eat competition going on over there. We could enter that, solve our lunch problems?"

Atty glances at the picture one more time and chuckles for a bit longer before responding, "I don't know about that. I checked it out earlier, and it is an all-you-can-eat situation, but there's a catch. You pay $5 to enter, but you have to eat at least 4 hotdogs, otherwise you have to pay restaurant price for each hotdog you actually ate. And the 'restaurant price' they listed is $30 per hotdog. So... it's risky."

I snort. "Aren't you hungry enough to eat 5?"

He's silent for a bit, but then he hops onto his feet, pulling me up with him. "You're right, let's go."

/\/\***/\/\***/\/\

I will be posting this one and the next at the same time because they were originally meant to be one chapter. However, if I posted them as one it would have been over twice as long as usual, which isn't fair to readers. So I split it into two :)

Please let me know what you think, I'd love to hear it!

Chp pic: pink katydid, one of Jade's favorites