Summer Crushes | Jeongchan

fourteen

Early Friday evening has Chan and Jeongin cuddled up on the Hwang's living room couch. Jeongin had the house to himself until later in the night when his aunt and uncle come home; Hyunjin was staying over at Seungmin's for the weekend and wouldn't be back until Sunday afternoon and even if Jeongin wanted Chan to stay the night as well, the older had his driving classes early the next morning and his own house was closer to the school.

Since it was a Friday, the group of friends decided to hang out for a while before heading home and found themselves at the arcade near their school where they spent a good couple of hours before calling it a day and separating for the weekend. Hyunjin was initially only going to take Seungmin home but it didn't take long before he was texting Jeongin about the change of plans and that he was going to stay over for the next couples of days. So Jeongin thinks that it's a blessing in disguise that Hyunjin isn't in the house. Apart from the fact that his cousin liked complaining about every little thing he can think of for the kicks of it, it's no secret that Jeongin isn't fond of physical affection. He finds it easier to initiate and keep skinship with Chan, though, and that's another thing that Hyunjin will complain about other than having to be in the same house as them being so... lovey-dovey.

Jeongin had his back on the couch, laying on his side to make what little room he can for Chan, who had turned away from the television some time ago in favour of mushing his face in the crook of Jeongin's neck. Jeongin's arms are wound around Chan's waist to keep the older from falling offㅡ it crossed his mind that there was a chance they'd end up rolling off the couch together but Jeongin will worry about that if it happens.

Chan and Jeongin were currently debating on whether or not they should attempt to cook dinner for themselves or order in. The former was looking less and less probable when Jeongin noted that neither of them were very confident in the kitchen and Chan commented that he was craving the noodles from a Chinese fast-food chain not too far outside of the neighborhood.

It's been a while since either of them had paid attention to the movie playing in the television. Chan is currently busy playing with the strings of Jeongin's (Chan's) hoodie and Jeongin is looking down at the older. They had agreed on calling in their delivery dinner later when they got hungry since it was still relatively early in the evening and they had a light snack before heading to Jeongin's house.

Taking advantage of the fact that Jeongin's mouth was directly in front of Chan's forehead, he kisses it to get his attention. "Channie."

"Yes, love?" Chan answers with an attentive lilt in his voice. His fingers are still knotting themselves between the strings of the hoodie Jeongin is wearing.

A few days have already passed and that time has done nothing to stop the way that Jeongin is being eaten alive by the confusion and animosity with the fact that Chan is hiding something from him. He can't get it out of his head, knowing that he found out from someone else; not knowing if Chan knows that he knows.

"Can we stay like this for a long time?" Jeongin doesn't like the way his voice almost cracks when he asks.

"Like how?"

"Like this." Jeongin tightens his arms around Chan; to keep him from falling off the edge of the sofa, to keep him close, here, Jeongin doesn't know. "Together. Is it selfish if I want us to stay next to each other?"

Jeongin isn't used to feeling so unsure. He's not used to wanting to feel selfish. He's not familiar with any of this but if it's Chan in the picture then he's willing to go through it. Still, he can't blame himself for thinking that maybe, it was better if he didn't know. He wants to think that he'll feel more at ease if he first heard of any of this straight from Chan's mouth, but that selfish part of him makes him add that it'll be even better if Chan would follow that statement with a definitive "I'm not going."