It's Not Checkmate Yet | FMA

Riza's POV

"We accept the love we think we deserve." ~Stephen Chbosky

***

Roy, if you are somehow hearing my passive agressive thoughts right now, you'd know for the billionth time that I think you are the biggest idiot that ever existed on the planet. Fighting when you stand no chance? Try it again, and you're dead.

"Riza, your face is freaking me out," Roy comments bluntly from beside me as we sat crammed in the car. I suddenly take note of how I was subconsciously scowling at him. I don't stop, though; instead, I whack the back of his head with my hand.

"You're the dumbest person I know," I reply, sounding just as casual as Roy did. "Remember, Roy. If you can't lose me, then I can't lose you. It's only, what do you alchemy-freaks call it.... Equivalent Exchange."

"You know, if it wasn't I who was your superior, I'm pretty sure you'd be released and tossed out of command with your talk," Roy smirks at me. I sigh, realizing that he's right. I hate how he's always... right! It's extremely frustrating! Roy may be an idiot, but he's a wise idiot, I suppose.

"Alright, you two," the disgruntled driving doctor interrupts, stopping the car. "I took the liberty to drive you all the way to command. Get out, or you're coming with me."

I open the door, getting out of the car, and expecting Roy to come with me. Only, he didn't. "I think I'm going with," he states decisively. "Go on without me, Riza." I sigh, feeling a bit more vulnerable to the flickering lamposts and starless sky. "I'll be back tomorrow," Roy promises.

"Alright, Roy," I say reluctantly, taking a deep breath and trying to gather my military-built toughness. "I'll see you then, I suppose." Roy winks at me, shutting the door I had left ajar and driving off with the doctor and armless royal guard. I have to admit, without Roy, I grew more anxious of being all alone in the dark.

I scurry into HQ, hoping to get to my dorm quickly. The hallways were, perhaps, even worse than outside. They weren't dark, but the dim and eerie light created very ominous shadows that elongated themselves and became monsters. Even my own shadow was warped into something that isn't me at all. Is that what the military did to me? Made me into something, or someone, that I am not? That I never would've become, had I not joined in the first place? Am I having regrets after coming this far?

You have no regrets?

His voice echoes in my head, loud and clear. Roy. He must never have any regrets at any time, and I could believe that. He was a very headstrong and determined person, much like Edward Elric. The only difference? Roy was experienced, and wise. There was also one more. I loved Roy.

I finally reached my dorm, Black Hayate greeting me with a cheerful bark. I shush him quietly, shutting the door as soft as possible. Everyone was sure to be asleep by now. I walk over to my blinds, which were suspiciously open. I glance around the room, and snap them shut with shaking hands, blocking out the silvery moonlight. I then proceed to turn on the lamp, breathing much more sharp and pronounced. What was wrong with me? What was gnawing at the back of my neck? Something was wrong. Something was totally, completely wrong.

The light calmed me somewhat, but I felt so scared still. I decide to take a quick shower, hoping that it would stimulate my brain and wash off all the cowardice I had somehow managed to contract. I turn on the faucet and close the door, stripping down and letting my dirty uniform fall to the floor. When the water was hot enough, I stepped inside and let the warm 'rain' fall on my face.

My longer hair was slowly being cleansed of the dirt that must've been picked up. My body felt much better as my back muscles were relieved of stress, due to the warm water. I'm finally able to convince myself that everything was going to be okay. Everything... is going to be... okay.

If only the pit in my stomach would stop telling me otherwise.

***

Whoa guys *_* it took me over a month to update. I'm so sorry about how much this book troubles me. I'm so glad you guys are so patiently waiting for my updates, rather than rushing me. I'll assure you all, that if you rush me on an update, I tend to do not so good at the chapter. Actually, when I am rushed, my chapters look like they should be thrown in the rubbish bin at once. So, I realy appreciate the patience you guys have displayed.

Uh... I hope this was satisfactory enough... since in Brotherhood, they sort of look through a different point of view than Roy and Riza, I will be able to fit in a buncha romance in the next chapter. So, uhm, thank you so much for reading. Don't be shy with your comments, yaddle yaddle, sorry it's so short, yaddle yaddle. Um. Okay. Bye.

~FullmetalOtaku