what more can i say | rini au

17. (ricky!pov)

Curled up on his red plaid flannel sheets with a tube of oreos (frozen) and half of a leftover Costco pizza (hot from the microwave), Nini and Ricky had a movie playing on his laptop on the dresser, the two only half watching, half simply content with enjoying one another's presence.

She leans against his arm, head tucked happily into his shoulder where it's always fit so perfectly as he leans back against the wall, pillow on his lap as some measure of comfort beyond her presence. He's always needed something to hold onto, something with some substance to it especially. Maybe that's why he clings tightly to his friendship with Nini. Part of why anyway. She's such an important part of his life.

That's not something he could bear to lose.

He almost forgets this intense comfort of her presence was such a big part of why he didn't stay another night at her house. But he can't forget. He can't let go of the reasons, just like he can't let go of her.

Nor can he forget the way things went down when he told her he wouldn't be doing so.

It's not even as though he'd texted her to meet him intending on doing what he'd done. It was just the split second decision he'd had to make. To say no not because he wanted to turn the idea of staying down, but because he so badly didn't want to stop.

There are a lot of things on his mind, and while they've more or less avoided the tough subject she came here to discuss in the few hours she's been here, their movie is ending, and they were hardly paying attention to it anyway.

—

"You want to talk about what happened?" He finally asks, his voice quiet as he turns to her, moving quite reluctantly to shut off the computer since it'd become clear neither was in the mood for auto playing whatever netflix came up with next. There were more important, less enjoyable things to address.

"I mean, I was sort of hoping we would. Or well- I think that's why Kourt and Aspen brought me here." She replies, that shy little smile on her face making his limited confidence falter just a bit.

"It's definitely why they brought you here, trust me." He says with a chuckle, a hint of regret crossing his face as he turns his eyes down, only for her to draw them back up again, her deep brown eyes hard to pull his gaze from.

"I uh- I may have been a bit harsh with you Neens, I'm sorry for that. You were just trying to be a good friend, supporting me through all this."

"Thanks, Ricky..." Nini replies, offering him a small smile, but that smile falls as she makes a quick decision in her head, confusing him a bit. "It's not just that though, you know... I'm very aware you appreciate my helping you, housing you, all that. It's something we don't talk about a ton, but trust me- I get that. I don't think you get why I'm upset." She's gentle, but it's more that struggling with getting the words out despite the way she clearly means them.

He examines her face for a few moments, trying to wrack his brain for something he may have missed.

Ricky Bowen knows so much about Nini Salazar-Roberts, from her middle name, Malaya, to the fact she has trouble eating raw celery (despite their youth soccer team's insistence on doing ants on a log as a snack what felt like every other week back in the day).

And yet right now he's drawing a blank as to what exactly the issue might be that he's not understanding. He was sort of rude about the whole thing when they spoke, and he understood that, but she claims that's not the problem. So what is?

"I- I don't think I do... I'm sorry... I'm trying, I really am. I- I should know you better than this, I've known you since we were 5 years old..."