By Sin We Fall

Chapter Four

As always, I arrived an hour early to the dance studio before class started. The floors were shiny, the sun rays were beaming through the windows, the room quite. It was perfect. I started doing my usual warm up with my headphones on. Thirty minutes later the door burst open and Mari came running in screaming, "Congratulations!" she ran into me, hugging me tightly. I stood there in shock for a second then remembered she was probably talking about my summer intensive. I didn't want everyone to get their hopes up that I got accepted into the American Ballet Institute before I knew for sure if I was going. Jenny came running in behind Mari and I hugged her tightly as well. "Oh, it's no big deal guys," I said, "I'm not even sure if I'll go." I tried to downplay it, maybe for my own sake as well so I wouldn't be too disappointed when the verdict came back. "No big deal? Greta, this is major you've been wanting this for so long!" "And nobody deserves it like you, you practiced like crazy for this!" Jenny said. I felt a bit uncomfortable with all the attention. I was always grateful to be a twin so all the attention wouldn't be on me during birthday parties. Nevio took the spotlight like a champ. "Thanks girls, that means a lot but I'm still nervous. I mean I've never even been away from my family." "Everybody will love you there, you will create a new family of support." Jenny said. I was getting excited and butterflies were fluttering in my stomach. I didn't want to get too high hopes in case they would be dashed in a second. I needed to know soon, although unknowns were better than no's, I had to know. Afterwards in the dressing room the girls were talking about any problems anybody had. Penelope was complaining about her boyfriend but I could never really relate to the inner workings of heartbreak or even the base urge of lust for someone. So I just stuck to encouraging words from the sideline. A lot of the girls had part time jobs, long time boyfriends and everybody had their drivers license. They were all so much more adult than me and I was the one somehow moving across the country, so far from the people who kept me safe and cared for. I didn't know myself truly yet and still I was moving away from everything I knew. It was so unlike me yet at the same time I had this dream since I could remember, for the sake of ballet I had the courage to do things out of my comfort zone. After changing I went to look for our teacher so I could pester her for anything that I could do to improve my turns. 

When I walked out of the studio ten minutes later there were only a few people left and some kids huddled in the front of the studio from a class below mine. I started walking to the spot where Matt always parked, dread settled over me when his car wasn't there. It was such a fixture in this parking lot that it was weird not seeing it. My worry was interrupted when a loud engine roared. My eyes shot with horror to the bright neon sports car. I stepped back for a second wondering if I could still run inside without anybody noticing. Embarrassment colored my face as I started walking over to the car. Why did he have to bring his most annoying car? I didn't want to get into that thing! The kids in the group were looking over annoyed at the loud engine and smell of gasoline. I quickly slid into the car with my head down hoping nobody saw me. "Nevio!" I whispered, "Can't you turn this thing down? You're embarrassing me!'' Matt never caused me this much trouble. "I can't, it is as wild as it is free," he said affectionately patting the steering wheel. "I can't believe your ballet kids aren't impressed by this beast of a car" He admonished me. "People with taste aren't attracted to things like this." "I can't believe you're embarrassed to see me, I'm the coolest person to know in this town." "Really, I was unaware, was there a citywide tally I didn't know about?" "Yep, I came in the star of everybody's list." He stormed away from the curbside and I hid my face again as he cut off oncoming traffic, accompanied by a flurry of honking and yelling. Nevio seemed blissfully unaware of the riot he was creating behind him. He continued to weave through the small streets till we found our way onto the highway then he accelerated to a speed that was way above any legal speed limit. The way Nevio drove in this city came so naturally, every turn was known like the back of his hand, he was a local through and through. All the hell he caused Las Vegas over the years, at the end of the day this place wouldn't be the same without him. This city screamed his name. While I felt like a trespasser on foreign land. We got off on our exit and Nevio flew past a traffic light. "Nevio! You totally just ran that light!" "It was yellow." "Yellow as the devil himself." I muttered. "Who says things like that? Your hanging way too much with those ballet freaks." As long as I wasn't like my family I was fine. "Do you think I can handle New York? What if I break?" I said more seriously, "The only thing you can break is this fake shell of delicacy you hide behind, the more you break the more authentic you become." "But I really rather prefer not breaking anything to get to that point." "That's the only way I've found."