70) Chick Lit Genre
am i the only one super excited for the chick lit genre even though to be honest, i don't even know what chicklit is but i'm still super excited bwahahaha.
71) The Girl Eatin' da Tampon *she needs jesus
Okay Giovanni or whatever her goddamn name is, she sucked the living hell out of a used tampon. That shit's nasty. GIRL YOU KNOW HOW STINKY PEROID BLOOD CAN BE. THAT SHIT CAME FROM YOUR VAGINA. THAT IS SO NASTY AND YOU NEED TO GET SOME SERIOUS HELP. I can't beleive she's gotten so much attention because of this. It's ridiculous. It's like eating poop, and that's so fucking gross. Like ew. WHYYYYYYYY A TAMPON THOUGHHHHHHHH. ew. Now, there's alot more girls pulling their tampons out and sucking it like it's a goddamn popsicle. GIRLS, you do not need to do nasty shit to get famous. Fame isn't everything. Look at Giovanni or whatever, she's getting so much negative attention AND fame because she sucked a tampon. You don't want to be famous for something that's atrocious and disgusting as that. Why would you even. What the hell. Ariana Grande (my goddess) even thinks she's gross, and she seems like the nicest person ever. LOL.
72) The Humor Genre [Part 2, I beleive? haha]
Tell me why I keep seeing these Spongebob quotes in the Humor section now? What the hell. I'm pretty sure there's 182389120830 stories about the Ugly Barnicle. Wasn't one book about enough? I mean, I personally love that episode of Spongebob. But, making multiple books about the same episode about Patrick talking about the Ugly Barnicle? HOW ORIGINAL. We only need one book about the Ugly Barnicle, okay? Shit. Hahah>
73) Long ass titles [Part 2]
Okay, I keep ranting about the same thing but alot of these are starting to piss me offffffff.
So I give to you, a part 2 of long ass titles :
" Excuse Me, Mr.Player I'm About To Kick You In The Face But I Love You"
" OMG!?!??!?!!! GOING TO AN ALL BOY BOARDING SCHOOL!?!??!? FML!!!!!!!!!"
"ME?!?!?!? THE UGLY GIRL FALLING FOR THE SCHOOL BAD BOY?!?!?!?!?!?!"
" Uh, why the hell are one direction in our car and why are we stuck in this car and why are we about to bang the shit out of one direction?"
" Omg, meeting one direction at starbucks and then falling in love at first sight with niall horan while drinking my caramel machiato with extra caramel!??!?!"
"Dear Mr.Perfect, meet your match Ms.Bad girl from hell"
"I'm so emo and I'm in love with a preppy dude what the hell"
"I'm so sad and stuff so i fall in love with my half brother"
ya, what is wrong with some of these authors
74) Descriptions in Stories
I really hate it when a story doesn't have a description about what the story is going to be about. One time, I actually was trying to read a story, and I ended up reading about a girl who was going to get raped by one direction or whatever? I'm just like, what the hell is wrong with this world. First of all, Harry Styles will never love you. I'm being honest here. He will never love you. OKAY? Face it, anyone that's under the age of 29 will have a chance with Harry Styles unless you are Taylor Swift. Cause he likes older women. Zayn Malik will never rape you cause he's in a serious relationship with that Perry chick. Liam will never rape you simply because I think he likes older women too. Niall Horan will never rape you because he like food too much apparently. ( have ya'll heard about him masturbating!? HAHAHHAAHHAAHHAAHHA ) Louis Tomlinson will never rape you because his girlfriend is beautiful as hell and he'll never let her go. SO PLEASE, get a grip on reality girls okay. But anyways, I'm going off topic huuuuur. I really hate when descriptions tell the WHOLE goddamn story. Now, I like it when descriptions cause leave a cliff ending because it makes me want to go read the story to know what happend!
75) A Story That Would Be Absolutely Terrible.
I'm about to write a terrible story, about One Direction.
Well, I'm in love with Harry Styles even though he likes older women's vaginas, i'm in love with Harry Stylez. He my baby boo forevur xooxoxo! But leh me tell u boot da story of me and my baby daddy Harry Styulez.
It all started at da Starbucks store place, you know where dey sell coffee at? well you know, i waz in da streetz, twerkin' fo' money. I'm a champion at twerkin' i can make mah booty clap. But ya, I twerk fo a livin' cos a girl gotta get it how dey live ya know. But anywayz, der i was with mah supermodel body and pretty face even tho bitches think it's ugly. Haterz are motivaterz. Anyways, thur he waz. My baby boo foreva. Harry Stylez. He was out wit dat Taylor Swift bitch. You know she be singing dat song "wE ain't EVER EVER EVER gettin back togethur" song. But yeah, he saw me. Then we looked into each otherz eyes. It wus like a match made in haeven!!!!!!! i wanted 2 go keeeessss him so badly and just rip his shirt off and you know..stuff..
He walked into da starbuckz with that Taylor bitch. So I walked in to get me a frappacino frap frap. Datz what I call it atleast. Him and Taylor were making out infront of me. So I said "AHEM, ya'll motha effers need jesus" Harry just smiled at me. Taylor looked angry as hail. I was like "Excuse me bitch do you wanta go cos i will beat cho ass" i was pointin' my fingurs at hur. She was like "No, I'm just here to get my caramel coffee thing" ya bitch das what I thought...bitch.
Harry Styles wrote somethin' on a piece of paper, and gave it to me. It said
"DAYUM GURL U GOTS AN ASS LIKE BEYONCE. here's my numba:
28903281903809103809012830890183091280 xxxxx - Harry Stylez"
I smiled. Man, life is about to get good real soon.
A few hourz lata, I went home. I live in a super awesome apartment with super awesome stuff like flat screen tvs and stuff. People wondor why I twerk fo money, when I really don't need it cos I'm rich. I wanna live like a normal gurl you know. I wanna twerk, it's my life! So I called Harry, and he answerd. "HEY IT'S BEYONCE BOOTY, HOW ARE YA" how the hail did he know it was me. Well anyways. "Yeah it's me beyonce booty ahhahaahahaha, come over." He waz like "Where do ya live girl" I said, "i live in los angeles baby come over i wanna take yo clothes off" He's like "Alright!"
Few minutes later he cammme innn. He was totes ready cause he already had his shirt off.
we be kissin and stuff then he asked, "What's your namezzzz?" I'm like "Kort-nie-ie-ie. but u can call me Kort." "Alright Kort, r u ready fo dis" "HELL YEA" I said with glee and well the end.
Then usually the author leaves a note like
"OMG I'M SO SORRY I SUCK AT WRITING"
well obviously..no offense... actually alot of offense. Just because you write fan-fiction, it doesn't exactly make your story really good okay. You can improve and write oringnal plots yannoe? :)
Sowwie guise, I haven't been updating alot lately. Exams are a pain in my arse. But hey, I've gotten good grades on all my exams, so I'm proud <3 <3 <3
LOVE YOU GUYS, you guys are all fab xoxoxoxoxoxoxo love u LOL
the reaction video to the girl eating tampon, it's the funniest thing ever. HAHAHA.
it's in the side description thing > hahehehehe
YOU ARE READING
Gurl, Wattpad Got Some Problems
HumorThere is some issues on Wattpad that needs to be addressed. Just wanted to rant about stuff that makes me mad on Wattpad, as a reader. I am also fabulous, *snapz*
