DIVISION 52 - BOOK II

CHAPTER XLIX

"I can't judge you. I'm fairly familiar with revenge." She said suddenly.

I raised an eyebrow and scanned her nondescript jacket that did in fact conceal weapons underneath. It didn't startle me. Not anymore.

"And did it help..?" I asked, watching the strands of red that fell past her face. Hell. She may well be an assassin for all I knew. The outer sectors were full of mysteries. 

"It took away my anger towards them. But not the consequences." She answered vaguely.

I was disappointed. I wanted to categorically know that revenge was paid in full when acted on. That emotions ceased or persisted. This answer was grey and shadowed. It was not black or white.

"I was hoping for more than that." I admitted in a low voice, "–the woman I want that revenge on tried to take something... important from me."

She stilled and looked me over for a while. It was strange to allow an unfamiliar face such access but it was also very liberating. There were no consequences to showing your weakness in front of someone with no ties to your life. They would have no part in it so there was nothing to lose.

"It's a double edged sword. Not a clean cut. Revenge gives and takes from you. You've got to figure out if the exchange is worth it." She paused and I met her eyes, "That woman... did she succeed in taking it from you?"

The world seemed to still around me at the question. Despite the foreign voice, it felt immensely personal. It seemed to cut right to the centre of me with its intensity. So much so, that I had to break her gaze and focus on the skies above.

"She didn't take it." I mumbled, tracing the metal at my fingers, "I just have no idea what to do about it. Trust is everything."

"Don't chase it."

I flinched and raised an eyebrow at her. She pressed her fist against the fountain and shook her head. "If that woman was desperate enough to try–she's not worth returning the favour. You'll only lose yourself more."

I laughed humourless. "Says the one that spoke of familiarity with revenge–"

"Do I sound satisfied with it?" She asked me slowly.

I met her dark blue again. I had blue eyes but I don't think they ever burned like that. They were passionate and familiar. It couldn't–

"I don't know... I don't know you–"

"It doesn't matter. I'm telling you. Revenge didn't satisfy me. Not once. What you do with that information is up to you."

I raised my brows. That was a lot more than black and white, that was full spectrum. 

"Where are you from–to be getting that sort of insight?" I pressed.

"The outer sectors." She drawled. "Where are you from?"

I rolled my eyes. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"I think I would." She murmured, watching the sun rise through the buildings, "–you don't sound like a liar."

I stood up at that with a frown. "Alright let's not pretend you know the first thing about me." I stated more irritated now. She raised her hands in surrender.

"You're right. I'm just a stranger talking to another stranger–"

"You're quite armed for a stranger." I quipped, scanning her legs and the expensive weapons on them. She buried her hands in her pockets and my eyes narrowed. "Did Proximo send you?"

She laughed, "Who?"

I sighed and pushed a hand through my hair. I was losing my mind. Besides she was barely out of the med bay.

"Forget it. Long week..." I muttered half hearted.

She pushed off the edge slowly.

"I understand that and I hope you get the answers you need." She told me watching the side of my face, "If you do look for revenge... you should figure out if it is worth the cost. Maybe I'll take your advice and see how true less is more really is in this city."

I was about to find an answer for the profound words this woman had sprung on me but she turned abruptly before I could think of the response. I stared in mild confusion as she disappeared beyond the other side of the fountain once more like a mirage. 

Had I just hallucinated the whole conversation? Sleep deprivation could do much worse to a person...  and Merridian had many strange people in it.

I needed to check on Artella. Then I needed to ask him for a favour.

I wanted to believe those words. That revenge would only take from me. But when I looked deep into my mind and confronted that image all I could see was the bare skin of her back and her legs pressed against Alex. Her hands roaming freely and her mouth beside her ear. There was no point hiding from it. I would always see that.

But I would see it less if she wasn't breathing.

I caught my reflection in the water again. Dark eyes. Bright blue. They used to be so full of innocence with no red on my hands. But those kinds of people didn't change things. Only women of action and consequence changed their future. I would do this right. I would do this with the most lethal contractor alive and maybe Merridian wouldn't be such a shit hole place if it lost another royal.