Wrought King of Iron

Chapter 26: Sacrifice

'Thank you, Mister.'

I looked up to the sky and gazed at the celestial lights. Looking up at the full moon hanging ever so brightly in the night sky, I was once again reminded of her.

'Do you miss them? All the friends and family that you lost in that tragedy?' I shouldn't have asked such a painful question to a broken child, but I said it without thinking.

'I... I've never really thought about them. I tried my hardest to forget everything before the fire. My previous life was gone, and so too were all the people in it. My parents and my friends all lost their lives. Yet I lived.'

Though his face remained static, tears started to well up in his eyes. It hurt to hear his response, and I immediately embraced him.

'Why... Why did I have to survive, and they have to die... I don't...'
He cried into my arms.

'Shirou! That's not true. Don't say such a thing. Listen to me. Even if they are no longer alive, they aren't dead. As long as you carry the memory of them, they will live on within you! Don't ever say such a thing.' The unbearable guilt he must have felt for being a survivor must have been painful. To lose everything you have, and still be forced to continue was a difficult existence, that he nonetheless had to endure.

'Mister, for their sakes I won't try to forget them. Even if it hurts, I will keep on remembering my parents who had tried their very hardest to allow me to live. I will remember the people who lost their lives, so that they can live on, even if it's only within me.'

'That's fine. That much is fine. The fact you remember them is proof of their value as humans. Never forget that and tarnish their lives.'

Even though I was talking to a mere imitation of a memory, it felt so real to me. But that brought forth a question within me. Is the current Shirou Emiya still as broken as this child before me?

'Is this a dream, mister? If you were truly Kiritsugu's friend, a man as kind as you would have come here before he passed away.'

Even though he was a fragmented child, he was still perceptive enough to realise things. Of course he would. Having been surrounded by death in such a traumatic experience, of course he would know. The both of us have always been close to death. But this child before me has experienced too much at such an awful time, in which those deaths will forever haunt him.

'It's true. I don't know who Kiritsugu is. This world isn't even real, as crazy as that might sound.'

'I see. If that is the case, then you probably came from the real world. Do you know the real me?' He seemed so accepting of what I said.

'I do. Not very well yet, but I'm beginning to understand.'

'Mister, do you think the current me was able to change? Does he ever remember his past and family? Is he truly happy?'

With a troubled expression, all I could say was, 'I don't know. But I promise that when this dream comes to an end, I will find out. If it isn't the case, I will tell him myself what I have just told you.'

He smiled, and said, 'Then I hope this dream ends soon.'

That last statement just reminded me the tragic truth that the end had only one path to reach it.

'To end it, you will have to die...' Crap! What am I saying to a child? Why did I say that to him? It will be hard for him to accept that, and harder for me to actually do it.

'If that is what is needed to happen, then go it's alright, mister.'

I was in disbelief. Did this child truly accept death so easily?

'Shirou! You know that if this dream ends you will cease to exist. Are you sure that you just want to give up your life that easily?'

'But you said yourself that this world isn't real. If that is the case, then that means I am not real. But you are. If the only way for you to escape this world is for me to die, then to the you who actually has value, I will give my life to you.' There was no hesitation in his voice.

I hugged him tighter, and started to cry.
'You idiot! The fact you are alive at this very moment means that you have value. It doesn't matter how short it may be! You should still treasure yourself! There are people who care for you and love you, so you shouldn't be so willing to give up your life.'

'The Shirou that people love is the one beyond this memory, right? It's alright mister. Talking with you, despite being so short, saved a part of me. Whether that translates to the other me, I doubt it will. So, rather than treating the end of this dream as killing me, think of it as bringing hope to the true me on the other side.' He hugged me back, and was smiling, despite his life coming to an end.

Taking a knife in hand that I had in my pocket, I raised it above the child's back.

'I will definitely save you, Shirou!'

A river of tears flowed down my cheeks, as I swung my small blade down and took whatever small life was left from that small boy.

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I woke up to the intense cold temperature of water against my body. When first entering the room, the water had barely any depth. But it seemed that it was rising. I was only in that dream for a short time but it seemed that the water levels had steadily risen in the time. I estimated around a quarter of the room had been engulfed.

Luviagelita had been holding both Shirou and I above the water, to prevent us from drowning. It seemed she managed to break out of the illusion faster than I and had held us afloat. Shirou was the only one still asleep.

Of course he was. A man as sacrificial as he, clearly wouldn't be up to the task of killing a small child. He couldn't sacrifice anyone even if it meant he would die. That was the kind of man he was. A Hero of Justice. But I couldn't accept that by being one, he has chosen to sacrifice himself to do it.

The moment he wakes up, I'll admonish him. I'll force him to take his own life seriously, and treat it with care.

But for now, the foremost issue was whether he would wake up before the water engulfs us and we drown. 

Wake up, Shirou!