Under the Influence (Benchtrio Troublemakers AU)

Chapter 6

Here you guys go. Uh yeah good luck with this one guys. Fyi if y'all think this one's hella angsty you are not prepared for the next part. Anyways....thank you guys for 1.1k reads  and enjoy!

Tw: Drug use, abuse, verbal abuse, child abuse, trauma, panic attack, implications of self harm, violence, and yelling 

"What the actual fuck Ranboo?!?" Tommy had slammed my box of drugs onto the table. Before I could say anything he lunged at me and grabbed me by my shirt collar. Toby was in the shower, so he had no idea what was happening currently.

"Tommy," I calmly stated, "whatever you think that is, it's not what it looks like."

He took a few deep breaths. He had brought me so close to his face, that I could see tears beginning to form in his eyes.

"Is this your box of drugs!? I've known Toby for a long time, so there's no way in hell this is his box and I know it isn't mine. So Ranboo," his voice cracked, "is this yours?"

I could never lie to them. Even if it was a matter of life and death. It just wasn't possible at this point.

"Yes."

Tommy let go of my collar and started to cry.

"Why Ranboo? why?!"

"There's a lot of stuff that happened in my childhood that led me down this path. Some things I'm not ready to talk about and some just really bad decisions. Like trying to impress a cute person at my high school or just being bored. But ultimately, Tommy, it's the path I've gone down and it'll take a lot of work if you want to help me fix it."

I tired hard to keep my voice calm but my emotions were bubbling to the surface.

"Where do you buy them?"

"The drugs?"

"Yes Ranboo! What else would I be talking about!?!"

"A drug dealer named Dream, I usually meet up with him downtown."

"How often?"

At this point, I was trying really hard to not burst out in tears.

"Every other month, I meet with Dream and this other guy who follows him around like a lost puppy. I buy whatever I need through working jobs for him. I don't even take them that often. It's only like twice a week. It's really not that bad."

Tommy was already sobbing at this point. I felt absolutely horrible. A quickly grabbed a tissue box and handed it to him. He forcefully took it.

"Ranboo why didn't you tell us?!"

"Because I knew you'd react like this. And I didn't want to see you so.... sad."

I was trying my best to stay calm for Tommy's sake but I could feel tears running down my face.

"Of fucking course I'd be sad! Ranboo, you are like family to us. It hurts us to see you hurting!"

"Tommy I'm-"

"What's wrong?!?"

A worried Toby ran over to us from the bathroom. His hair was still wet and he was wearing one of his bee sweatshirts.

Tommy gestured at the box of drugs on the table. I looked away, ashamed.

"That's Ranboo's drug stash." Tommy said coldly.

He seemed more calm now, but I could tell how mad he was.

"Ranboo? Is this true?!" Toby worriedly asked.

"Yeah..." I quietly answered; the shame visible in my voice.

"Ranboo..." Toby's eyes were wide and tearing up, "why didn't you tell us?"

"What was I supposed to say?!? 'Oh yeah by the way I have a pretty big drug addiction because of my traumatic experiences in high school and my earlier years of life. I hope that's completely cool with you.' You guys totally would have kicked me out then!"

"But what about being honest with each other?!? Does that not matter?!? Has it ever mattered to you?!?"

Tommy was yelling at me at this point and Toby was arguing back at the same volume. I couldn't even tell what was being said anymore. All I knew was that it was too loud. I quickly covered my ears

"He's so fucking useless!!!! Why did I let you have that useless fucking kid!? I should have made you get an abortion!!"

More loud sounds came from upstairs. I curled up into a ball beneath one of our houses many pieces of furniture.

"Nate! He just got a B on a math test! And he's a first grader for fucks sake."

Crashing sounds. Then hysterical crying. Blood curdling screams. I covered my ears. The sounds were so loud that the excessive pressure I was putting on my ears did little to dampen the horrible sounds.

"Linda! Shut the fuck up! You stupid bitch! The sex was the only good thing about you and you had to birth that abomination!? Ha! You really are pathetic! I'm leaving you and that stupid kid!"

His loud footsteps echoed through the house and shortly after I heard the door slam shut.

My mind refocused on the present before being dragged back to the past.

I was woken up to loud yelling. So I got out of bed and went to investigate. The sounds were coming from my mother's room. She was yelling at my step dad but I couldn't make out what she was saying, so I got closer.

"Why are you even defending him?! I've lived with him long enough to realize that his father was right! He really is a failure! He's so ugly! I can't even look at him sometimes! Why do you think I avoid him all the time?! I work overtime so I don't have to be around him! His father was so right! I should have got that abortion!" I stood there shocked. What was I supposed to think about that? My dad left when I was 6 and now my mom hates me at 10. I quietly tip-toed back to my bedroom, crawled back in bed and cried myself to sleep.

The yelling was too unbearable at this point that I ran to the bathroom and locked the door. They continued arguing. I fished through my pockets and found some loose pills in there. With shaking hands I swallowed them; not bothering to check what they were first. After a mild amount of hyperventilation, I passed out.

I woke up in a cold sweat and checked my phone. The time read 6:45 am. I got up quickly, but carefully from the filthy bathroom floor and dusted myself off. I quickly splashed my face with water and made sure the bandage on my arm was wrapped tight enough. I unlocked the door. I expected Toby or Tommy to jump on me but they were both asleep near the door. I really am sorry guys. I took a large deep breath, and walked out our front door.