Chapter 29 - Illicit Affairs

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- Emmett -

I sat on the bench at the bus stop around the corner from Alfie's house, one hand gripping my handle bar to keep my bike upright, waiting for the all-clear text. His family was going out for the afternoon. "So, we'll have the whole house to ourselves," he said when he called earlier to tell me to come over. Now, I was just waiting here for them to leave.

This wasn't the first time I'd sat on this bench, my leg bouncing as I listened hyper-vigilantly for my phone to ding. I did this so many times when we were dating. And just like back then, I had this pit in my stomach. I felt sleazy, like I was a mistress waiting for my man's wife to leave so I could slink in where I didn't belong, stealing moments before he returned to his real life, in which I could never take part.

I used to push this feeling down and ignore it because I loved him and I wanted to be with him no matter how. But, sitting here, I wondered why I was suffering through this again. Just for a few moments, where I could pretend he was someone else. Someone I actually wanted to be with. It was so very fucked.

Then my phone dinged, and I was on my feet.

ALFIE: They're gone. Get that sexy ass over here right now.

I threw my leg over my bike and rode to his house. After stashing the bike in the bushes out front to hide the evidence of my existence, I snuck around the house, hopping the chain-link fence. His window was open, waiting. I had barely climbed through when Alfie grabbed me around the waist and whisked me to the bed, tugging at my clothes. I was having major deja vu from last year. Most of our relationship happened in this room. He still had the same gray plaid bedspread and gray sheets. The same poster for Terminator 2: Judgement Day hung above his bed. A photo of his perfect family all dressed up for Easter, standing in front of his grandpa's picturesque church, sat on his nightstand. His father's taciturn face stared at me disapprovingly as Alfie nibbled on my earlobe, grinding his pelvis into mine.

"Take off your shirt," Alfie commanded.

I complied without question or comment. Our relationship had never involved much talking.

"Roll over," he said.

Apparently, he wanted to get right to it today.

When I flipped over onto my stomach, he yanked my shorts down and poured the frigid lube on and started without warning. It had been over a year since I last had actual sex, so it was painful to start. Not that he noticed. But I soon relaxed, biting back moans as my mind wandered to Clay.

Clay had a picture on his Instagram from a couple months before we met of him on a large fancy boat, deep-sea fishing in the Gulf with his friends, in which he had no shirt. I'd stared at that picture a lot. I even took a screenshot, so I didn't accidentally like it by mistake as I lusted over him like a creeper.

My fantasy got interrupted when Alfie pressed a hand between my shoulder blades, pushing me against the mattress, spouting a lot of self-congratulatory statements about how much I liked it. With my face squashed into the bed, I couldn't agree.

Before I knew it, Alfie came and left.

I stood up, pulling myself together. Alfie, still stark naked, leaned against the open widow, muscles rippling beneath his dark brown skin. He put a joint between his lips, striking a lighter to ignite the end. He took a drag, holding it in his throat before blowing the smoke out the window. He held it toward me, offering it up.

Funnily enough, that same gesture brought us together in the beginning. It was at one of Jackson's many parties. I was deathly bored, being ignored by Carrie, despite her assurances that she wouldn't abandon me. She was playing some drinking game with Jackson, beating him senseless. I went outside to get some air, because someone had puked in the kitchen sink, and Jackson poured bleach into it to wash it out, so the house smelled like a mixture of vomited up vodka and bleach. On the back porch, I found Alfie lighting a joint. He looked over when I walked out, giving me a once over. He offered me the joint, which was very strong. A few tokes had me in haze. We were the only ones outside, because it was freezing, with actual ice on the ground. He just leaned in and kissed me. He asked me if I wanted to go to his car and mess around. Obviously, I said yes.

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