𝐐𝐮𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐚 𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐚 𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐚 - Måneskin

Chapter 19 ◌ Le debolezze della gente

An elderly, balding man enters my room, he introduces himself as Dr. Rossi, the emergency doctor that operated on me. He tells me I was hit by a car somewhere on the streets of the countryside out of Rome and I had broken my cheekbone and my right forearm, but it could have been much worse. The driver had called an ambulance and now I am laying in a hospital bed in the Gemelli University Hospital. I wasn't wearing any identification forms and not a phone as well, but a paramedic immediately recognized me so they brought me to this private hospital. They googled our manager Fabrizio and contacted him. 

My thoughts begin to wander somewhere else so I don't hear anymore what he's saying. I just can't remember what happened before the crash, only the sweet voice that was calling me. I'm mad at myself for listening to her and giving in to the darkness. 

"Mister David, your colleagues are waiting downstairs in the hallway, shall I let them in or do you want to rest?" the doctor asks. I nod although I am exhausted and I don't know what they know and how they will react. Dr. Rossi leaves the room and 5 minutes later my friends run into the room. 

"Don't ever do that again!" Thomas shouts when he closes the door behind him. Ethan's face loses color when he sees me and Victoria immediately stumbles to my bed. "Mi dispiace tanto, Damiano," she sobs. Her eyes are bloodshot from rubbing them and crying. She kisses the cheek without the bandages and as her lips touch my rough skin I remember. 

I remember my yelling and her crying and the boys being mad at me. I remember the shards of glass I left on the ground. I cut my hands on them. I remember her screams and their sweetness. I lastly remember the deafening thought of running away from them. 

Now they're here I realize I was selfish and wrong, wrong for yelling, exploding and leaving them behind to protect them. I was scared I'd hurt them with my shatters but now I see their faces, I know I had already done that. They look devastated and powerless but relieved to see me. God I love my friends more than anything. I hate myself for thinking loving people is a weakness because I am scared to get hurt over and over again. I really need to open up instead of keeping everything in my own shell because I know my friends love me as well.

I've started crying again. Vic is sniffing and holding my hand, her thick tears soak my covers. Thomas caresses her back and takes our entangled hands in his. Ethan tries to lay his arm around me without hurting me, I actually don't feel anything at the moment because of the painkillers. Yet the color of my skin tells me I am all blue and bruised. We stay like this for a couple more minutes in silence. I look through the windows, it's already dark outside and it has begun to rain.

"I'm so sorry ragazzi," I mutter, but Vic shushes me. "We're happy they've found you, we were so scared. I couldn't stop thinking about what might have happened and it's our own fault as well," she weeps and Thomas and Ethan nod agreeingly. 

"We were so scared when Fabrizio stood at the door, saying you were hit by a car and now laying in a hospital," Ethan affirms. "We tried to move here without being followed by the paparazzi but this news is spreading like a wildfire, so they're probably standing outside already to get a glimpse of us."

"Bastardi," Thomas says under his breath. 

"Our fans are upset as well, they probably already see it coming that we won't be performing in 2 days," Ethan continues. 

I shake my head, I completely forgot about our show. "What if we still play for them? I still want to try it for them," I admit. "No no no, you have to heal and rest, we'll just postpone it. Fabrizio promised he will take care of it," Victoria responds, "and you'll probably have to stay here for another day or two."

I look down, I am not that kind of person that likes to stay in bed all day, but I feel peaceful now. My thoughts finally are on a row because of the things I realized unconsciously. 

"We'll do whatever you want for you," Thomas says, "but please go talk to someone. It's time to get help or we won't be able to resume anything. We can't go on with you being so irritable and hot-tempered, yet we all know it's because you're still in pain because of the past. But if we want to move on and grow you need to let certain things go, for your own sanity."

Vic looks and Thomas and she continues: "We want you to be happy because we love you and you are enough and your feelings are validated. But everytime our love backfires, you make us feel completely defenseless. We were worried sick because of you and I still am insanely mad at you for doing this, but right now just glad we've got you back."

"Please let us in Damiano, or let someone help you to get better," Ethan finishes. 

I swallow, the truth hurts more than the things I am holding onto, and they know it. I still have old ghosts haunting me but my friends try to see right through of them, maybe they can scare them away.

***

A/N: Heyyy my lovely readers, as I've commented on your messages a couple of times, I've started uni again so I'll post less updates sadly,  but I'll try to do one or two a week and I kinda want to choose quality over quantity. I am so excited to continue the story but give me some time ;)

I hope you're still enjoying my story, I can't believe I started already 4 weeks ago! 

Andddd: I am thrilled for the Loud Kids on tour, I've got tickets for Brussels hihi so I am going to see them live again. I kinda want to go to Amsterdam as well... Are you guys going to see them because I'm honestly curious, soooo tell me!! (if you're going to Brussels, for sure leave me a message or a comment)

Have a nice day sweeties, ly all <33