LET'S PISS OFF THE NEIGHBOURS

35 | fulfillment

There was a long pause while both males stared up at the full moon in all its glory. It was a comfortable silence and Jungkook was glad the older didn't question him further about his unhealthy choices. He just wrapped half of the blanket around his slightly trembling shoulders, which the younger appreciated greatly while scooting closer to keep warm.

"You know, I used to love watching the stars as a kid. I still do. It's so incredible to think that in a way, we're looking into the past. Since they are so far away, even if they die, to us they still shine for thousands of years before fading away. It's like the sky is a time machine." Jimin enthused with a small smile.

This was all the more reason for Jungkook to appreciate the view that night. But then he remembered the events from earlier. He felt so guilty even though he shouldn't. Why did he always feel so compassionate, even towards the ones who hurt him? No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't shake that feeling out of him.

"I had sex with Hoseok." He finally admitted.

Jimin glanced over at him with widened eyes before looking away again, a small breath escaping his lips in shock. "Wow.. I was not expecting that." He pursed his plump lips and thought for a moment.

"Was it for revenge or just personal pleasure? How does Hoseok even feel about that? Does he know about your and Taehyung's.. well umm, complicated relationship?"

Jungkook shook his head silently, not knowing how to respond. Honestly, he was trying to figure it out himself. Maybe it was for some kind of self gratification to show that he wasn't worthless and only capable of being used. But on the other hand, he really wanted to show Taehyung what it felt like to be in his position. To feel unwanted and broken.

Yet after all that.. he wasn't satisfied at all.

In fact he felt like an awful person. Even though they weren't dating it still felt so wrong, because deep down Jungkook knew that the older did feel the same way. But it was harder for him to admit it. He should have let him figure it out instead of pushing and complicating things.

"Jimin, do you think I'm a bad person?"

Jimin could tell he was in a lot of though and conflict with himself, so he brushed off his unanswered questions knowing he will tell him eventually.

Instead, he furrowed his eyebrows at the weird question. "No of course not. I just think that you've been put in a very new and complicated situation which made you confused on how to act. I know that you have gone through a lot of pain in your life which drives you to protect yourself from getting hurt even more. We can't always know what the best thing to do is and sometimes there isn't a solution, although that shouldn't discourage us to stop trying. I also very strongly believe that Taehyung isn't a bad person either. He might be a little dense about the fact that his actions have an impact on others, but don't forget he is also having to deal with figuring his sexuality out. That can be a very big change for some people to deal with."

Jungkook listened carefully while picking at the fluffy ends of the blanket.

"We both came to terms with it at a very young age so we had more time to figure it all out, but he's only finding out about it after years of being convinced that he was straight. Imagine what kind of turmoil that must create in his head. But I think what's most at fault here is the lack of communication between the two of you. I get it can be hard to talk about these things, but holy shit what a mess this has come to, which could have easily been avoided by an honest conversation."

It didn't take long for Jungkook to respond as he's made up his mind about what he needs to do. Unlike someone he knows, Jungkook acknowledges when he's done something wrong and is able to own up to his mistakes. It's not a sign of weakness, the opposite in fact which Jungkook is learning to understand on his path of self love and acceptance.

"You're so right. I've been quite selfishly blinded by my own feelings to really think about that. I want nothing more than to fix this, but I still need time to think so I won't do something compulsively again and potentially ruin this even more. Thank you Jimin for everything.. again. I don't know how you keep finding the best moments to find me, but I really appreciate it." Jungkook smiled while resting his head on his shoulder.

"It's nothing. As long as you get your happy ending, I will be satisfied." Jimin caressed his hair as they both got immersed with the stars once more.

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heyyyyy im back! i hope you didn't miss me too much ;D

i hope you're all doing well and that this chapter was enjoyable to read, the next chapter should also be out very soon so please look forward to that!

see ya ♡