dreaming

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Emily's POV
"Emily." Hotch sighed. No. He's wrong. His face says it all. It's not true.

"I'm sorry." Franklin squeezed my hand and I went numb. "She never made it off the table." Hotch whispered. Elle cried and Spencer tried to calm her down.

"Emily. She's gone." I shook my head and stood up. "You're lying. She's ok. I know she's ok. She didn't die. She couldn't have died. She wouldn't die." I stated.

Jennifer Jareau would not have left me by myself. She could never.

I tried to walk to the nurses station but Hotch grabbed my arm. "Emily." I pulled my arm away and looked at him. "The last time we were here you faked a death. How do I trust you?"

"Mom. Stop." Franklin sighed. I sat back down and hugged my knees. I dug my head down and didn't move.

"Emily." Someone yelled. They kept yelling my name until I woke up in my bed.

"No more compartmentalizing. What happened?"
"You died. And I couldn't do anything."

JJ grabbed my head and held it in her arms. "It was just a bad dream. Everyone is okay." I sat in her arms for at least an hour.

I looked at the clock and it was already 5 am. JJ had fallen asleep so I started to get ready. JJ showed me a 24 hour gym and I drove straight there.

I needed to do something. Usually I'll work out with Morgan but I didn't want to wake anyone up.

JJ's POV
I woke up to a call from Penelope. She hadn't heard from Emily today and was wondering if she's ok. I told her she's ok and went to look around the house.

She wasn't there.

I tried calling but she left her phone in the kitchen. There is only one place she would go this early, the gym.

"Where's Emily?" I asked the front desk girl. She pointed to the locker room and stormed in. Emily was sitting on the floor against the wall so I sat next to her.

"What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"Wrong. Something is bothering you Emily."
"I'm terrified. I used to not have anyone depend on me. Then I met you. And we got Franklin. And Sophia. Now there's a little baby."

I held my hand out and she grabbed it.

"What if you had died? Before Hotch told me you were alive I couldn't breathe. I can't breathe without you. And there is no way I can put on a happy face for Franklin and his family." She sighed.

"You wouldn't need to put on a smile. You would just need to take your time but allow them to help."

"I just need a break. Like a chance to breathe away from everyone and everything. Not you though. I'd want you right by my side."

"Then let's do it. It's been like 25 years since we got married. Let's go on a honeymoon again. Just you and me. Away from everything."

She looked at me and I smiled. "Hotch gave us time off. Let's use it."

I helped her to her feet and I followed her home. We immediately started packing. I sent a text to everyone saying where we were going and loaded our stuff into the car.

I bought tickets to Ireland on the car ride there and we left within three hours.

Emily fell asleep on the plane and I read my magazines. I held onto her hand just incase.

We landed and went to a hotel in downtown Dublin. Emily unpacked and we went to a bar for food.

"Here's to an eventful week." I said holding up my beer. "And a spontaneous honeymoon." She added, clinking our glasses.

"I love you." She smiled. We got good bar food and went to walk around Dublin.

I'm going to be honest I don't remember much. There were a lot of bars we visited and Emily kept telling people we were newly weds.

I woke up in the hotel the next morning and Emily was already dressed and ready. She took one look at me and laughed.

"Good morning princess." She joked. I rolled my eyes and she handed me a cup of coffee. "Whatever we did last night was fun. Not that I remember much." I smiled.

"Oh don't worry. You didn't embarrass yourself. But you did yell "she's my fucking wife." a lot. I think it got us more free drinks." She smiled.

I groaned and we went out to breakfast. Well. Lunch. Penelope called and she was clearly tired.

"I needed to check up on my traveling girls. We haven't talked all day. For me. Who knows how many days it's been in Dublin. Ok I'll leave you be." She said as soon as we answered.

"We didn't even say anything." Emily said. We got fish and chips and we went to go sightseeing. It was a pretty good day.

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