Remdy one shots

Interview From Hell

In which Andy is looking for a new job (In an au where neither black veil brides or palaye exist)

Trigger Warnings: Mentions of Sexual assault

"Thank you for seeing me on such short notice," Andy says, once he's greeted the interviewer and sat down on the couch in her office.

"Now that I now what you look like, I'm sorry I didn't see you sooner."

Andy smiles a half smile, unsure of whether to be flattered or slightly disturbed.

"You're applying for the job of editor, I see."

"Yes. I have plenty of experience. I've worked a lot with journalism." He waits for her to give a response, though when she does, he wishes he hadn't heard it.

"That doesn't matter to me, Andrew. I wonder the experience you have in other areas..."

Andy sits up straight. "I'm sorry?" He asks, mildly alarmed and what she's implying. He crosses his legs.

"Let's both be honest, now, Andrew. I know and you know that it's not the job you're bothered about. What would an attractive man like you be doing here just for a job?"

"No, that's not-"

She moves from her chair and onto the couch, shushes him. "There's no need to lie about it, Andrew. I won't tell."

"I'm not lying." He moves away from her. "I came here for the job and just the job. That's why it's called a job interview and not a porno."

"With looks like that, who are you kidding?" She touches his cheekbone with her fingers and he pushes her hand away.

"I can see you're not gonna take me for anything more than a pretty face, so I'm gonna go. Thank you for the opportunity." Andy begins standing up and she puts a hand to his thigh. Andy pushes it off him. "I'm married," he says. "To a man."

"Aren't we all."

"Even if I wasn't, why would I apply for a job to screw the boss? That's not how thing work. Not for me, anyway. And if that's how you do things, I strongly advise you to have a good look at yourself, because that's disgusting."

She doesn't seem offended by his words. Andy realises she probably finds it hot, and she says in a hushed tone, "Don't be afraid, Andrew."

The man pushes a creeping hand off his knee, turns himself away from her and folds his arms. "I'm sorry if my looks tell you otherwise, but I am not interested in fucking anyone for money, alright? And the fact that you would ever think that in the first place is majorly offensive. I have a brain, emotions, a life that doesn't include getting jobs by having sex with the boss. The only person I will ever fuck, ever, is my husband. I would hope you would feel the same, but clearly you don't. God help your poor husband. Goodbye."

"Don't act so crazy, Andrew. Is it so wrong to be appreciated?"

Andy scoffs. "Appreciated? I'm appreciated by my husband, by my friends, by everyone who cares about me beyond how good I might be in bed! The only thing you appreciate is the fact that I'm a younger man who works out and has blue eyes. Don't talk to me about being appreciated, you're a fucking joke!"

"No man could appreciate you the way a woman can."

"That is wrong on so many levels. Are you really so one track minded that you can't imagine that a handsome man might not be automatically attracted to you? Are you so shallow that the only value you have for me is that I might contaminate myself with your disgusting body? There is a man waiting outside for me. He'll ask how this has gone because he cares and he appreciates me enough to care. He loves me, and not just because he thinks I might stick my cock up his arse! I am fucking horrified that you are in charge of such a large corporation, and I sincerely hope that you lose everything and have to live off tinned beans and a blanket for the rest of your sad, disgusting life. And by the way, when he asks, I'll tell him it was a fucking joke and that the boss is a sexual predator with no concept of professionalism."