━━ chapter seventeen

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SEVENTEEN

waters rising

No one 'round here's good at keeping their eyes closedThe sun's startin' to light up when we're walking homeTired little laughs, gold-lie promises

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No one 'round here's good at keeping their eyes closed
The sun's startin' to light up when we're walking home
Tired little laughs, gold-lie promises

━━━━━━・❪ ・━━━━━━

STANDING ON THE SHIP ALONE, CAS had time to think. It was a mess of thoughts, things she said, and things she never did but wished she could. Usually, when being left alone, her thoughts brought no solace, but with the cool air on her face, she felt calm and peaceful.

With no tears left to cry, really what she thought was no tears left to cry, she went on her way, mind steady like her fingers against the gold of the ship.

As air moved past her face, flicking at her skin, cold as Asgard flew past. She heard chaos coming from the palace, anarchy erupting in guilty smiles that blessed Cas' face. The air lay on her skin almost like water droplets in the grand scheme of things, comfortable and close, she was almost comforted by the idea.

She knew the cost, her job, and what would happen. Loki falls from a dark elve's ship, Thor and Jane next. to them, she nodded, chuckled out a quip directed at Loki, who smirked at her with sparkling green eyes that hid empty pain and golden sorrows. But Cas saw it, she had to look deep but she saw it, and it comforted her.

Mindless, not thinking of what was to come, despite being in chains, Loki took her hand, his fingers laced with hers. He squeezed it, both of them holding on, as it could be the last ache of contact shared between the two. Not thinking of that, no, not daring to wonder what their lives would be like without the other.

Cas dropped his hand as they moved into svartalfheim, gripping the controls, looking above Thor and Jane as they arrived. Glinting with power, her breath became steady, greeting with the familiar comfort of magic gripping her fingertips. She looked at Loki for the first time, he watched her with a small smile, a proud glint in his eyes. She wondered what he was thinking, but she didn't speak, her mind on the distress of the air.

They crested the hill, Loki walking with an odd posture, bent over as he watched the elves approach. Thor held Jane close to him and Cas stood alone, holding her arms across her chest, waiting for something. Three silhouettes on a rocky mountain, Jane's mixed with Thor's, her eyes dark and cold. Cas waited, her hair blowing, flicking at her face.

"You know," Thor started, looking at Loki. "This plan of yours is going to get us killed." Cas was enlightened on the plan, Loki would betray Thor and Cas had to act surprised.

"Yes, possibly," Loki said, stealing a look at Cas. Something of a look was shot at Thor, an agreement perhaps. He motioned to his handcuffs and Cas could hear Thor sigh at his brother. "You still don't trust me, brother?"

"Would you?" Cas asked, stepping forward with a glint in her eyes.

"No, I wouldn't." There it went. With a glance of mock surprise and another shared look between Cas and Loki as they ran into battle, Cas's fingertips reached for the hilt of her sword as she ran with Jane.

Dirt, black sand that mimicked that of the banks of the underworld's rivers, Cas watched as bedlam erupted through the realm. Cas wondered if this was the closest the nines got to Hel without being it.

"Do you think I cared about Frigga?" Loki asked, playing off the act. Even though she knew it was a ruse, it stung Cas and she looked at him, not being noticed. "About any of you?" Cas looked down as he looked back at her. "All I ever wanted was you and Odin dead at my feet!" Cas looked away, doing her best not to give in to the lies. "Malekith, I am Loki of Jotunheim, and I bring you a gift." He practically threw Jane at the elf and Cas waited for the ruse to fall.

Cas was muttering greek curses under her breath as she steadied at Loki's words, knowing they were fake and the lies on his tongue. She listened for Thor's scream and waited for the anarchy to ensue.

Blade and magic mixed between Cas's fingers, her hands mixing with the hilt of the sword and the gold, black, and tinged pink of Greek, godly magic. She was trained to fight like this, the hit and blade of her sword melding together in perfect, dark symmetry. Soon enough, elvish bodies fell at her feet and she was finally breathing right.

Loki was cornered, and there she was, fighting at his side, saying nothing amongst the hilts of their blades and the falling of elvish skin.

"Go," Cas murmured when she saw the way Loki looked as he watched Thor in trouble, fighting the creature that killed Frigga. "I can handle this."

He kissed her cheek and ran, Cas watched gently before knocking someone down and seeing what could have been bad out of the corner of her eye.

And then the worst happened, and Loki wasn't on her feet anymore. And Cas was running. And Thor was leaving, possibly because he saw her almost reach him, because Jane needed him, or simply because he believed Loki was dead. Whatever the reason, Cas didn't know, lest she care.

"Cas," he choked between ragged breathing as Cas kneeled beside him, hands looking for a place to heal, his skin cold against her warm hands, beginning to become corrupted with the shallow pooling of scarlet that hung at his chest.

"I'm here, love, I'm here" she chided gently, watching as one of Loki's hands found her own.

"My own brother left me," his voice, like his breath, was uneven, weak, and raspy. "It's always just been me and you."

tears pricked at Cas's eyes as she chucked a response weakly, sniffing gently. "just me and you." She did her best to stay calm, but Loki reached up and moved the hair from her face, leaving a trail of blood in his finger's wake.

"We were not designed for a happy ending," his words seemed almost a promise from his lips.

"don't- don't say that," Cas said, her voice turning to a sob.

"I'm glad for the time we had-"

"No," Cas's voice was demanding." You will not leave me." She would not be turned into a tragedy. "Do you understand?"

Loki nodded, his hand corrupted with blood reaching down to cup her cheek, the other reaching for her hand. His skin was losing the ivory color and mixing in with droplets of blue, soaking through as if it were water wetting a cloth.

Magic flicked through her fingers, trying her best, to lack of avail, to get the bleeding to stop. Her fingertips brushed his skin, reaching underneath his armor to flick through his skin, trying to make it a manageable wound, but it seemed futile as Loki grunted, his breath labored and weak.

She knew, deep down that she couldn't heal him here. Not fast enough for it to make an indent in his livelihood. She couldn't do this here.

Not if she wished for his life.

Not if she wished for his life

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━━━━━━・❪ ・━━━━━━

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