when the words start to overflow

Loneliness

I've been lonely for a long time now.

Honestly, I don't know how much longer I can take it.

I sit alone through class.

I watch others laugh and joke with their friends.

But me?

I just sit.

I don't talk.

I wish I would.

Maybe then might people like me.

But every time I did, they just made fun of me.

Now I've entered the new school year, which is my first year of high school, and I've been alone.

I do have one friend though.

My bestfriend.

She made me less lonely.

She makes me laugh until I can't breathe.

I enjoy every second with her, and I love her more than she can ever imagine.

But I don't have any classes with her, nor lunch.

So what am I to do when we have to partner up?

What am I to do when we pick out seats?

My anxiety only builds up and I miss her all the more.

All I need is one person.

My person.

The one I can be true with.

Who doesn't make fun of me, and instead laughs along with me.

I appreciate her more than words can describe.

She gives me company.

She gave me a friend.

She gave me happiness.

But without her, I am back to nothing.

I go through each class, silently listening.

Boredom.

Every day seems the same.

And I try to make friends,

but it's never the same.

No one can match up to her.

Avarie.

Avarie is her name.

Avarie is the girl I miss more than anything right now.

It's a little off topic, but I want to talk about her.

She showed me what a real friend is.

All my life I have been made fun of and my friends had left me, except her.

It started in 5th grade.

We had common interests.

Fast forward four years and we are closer than ever.

Oh how I love her.

I wish she could see herself through my eyes.

Let her never be insecure again.

I've talked to her about every topic you can think of.

And she doesn't judge me.

For once, I am not alone.

For once, I am appreciated.

For once, I am wanted.