Green - a werewolf story

28. Decisions

"You left," Green said.

Vanessa glared at him, annoyed that he'd once again managed to make this conversation about her and, worse, reminded her of a time in her life she wanted to forget.

"Cult life isn't for everyone," she said.

"And you still won't tell me what pack you were part of."

"Why would I? It's none of your business."

The muscles in Green's rather formidable jaw clenched. "I can't show you that pack life isn't what you think it is if I don't know what you've gone through."

"That's hardly my problem," Vanessa said and looked back at her computer, hoping he would take it as a dismissal and not as a sign of how uncomfortable discussing her past made her.

"No, you're my problem," Green said.

Vanessa looked up at his tone. He sank down on the chair next to her.

"Vanessa."

"What?" she asked irritably.

She didn't like how he was looking at her. His expression was a cross between patient and overbearing and she wanted to shake him to bring it back to annoyed.

"I don't want to push you, but I would appreciate it if you didn't come at me every time I ask you about your past," he said.

"I don't want you to ask me about my past. So stop doing that and I won't come at you."

"But I want to get to know you," Green said. "And that's part of who you are."

"It's certainly not part of who I am!" Vanessa protested.

She'd given up everything, several times, to make sure that it wasn't.

"Of course it is. Going through whatever you went through shaped you into who you are today."

"So?"

"So I want to know how that happened."

"Why?"

"Because I want to know you!" he snapped, finally out of patience.

"Well, I don't want to tell you and it's my story so I'm the one who decides who gets to hear it."

"Fine," Green said irritably. "You don't want to talk to me about it, but you should talk to someone about it. You're clearly not over it."

Vanessa, who thought she was as over it as she would ever get, glared at him.

"I thought you were doing anthropology, not psychology," she muttered.

"The fields are closely connected."

"I bet."

"Both are a study of human nature."

"Yeah, but I'm not human, am I?" she said.

"You're humanoid."

"That's nice. Makes it sound as if I have a disease, which is quite close to what I've always considered my wolf tendencies to be like."

"It's not a disease!"

"You're right," Vanessa said. "It's more like a curse. Mooncursed, wasn't that how the condition was referred to back when people still acknowledged our existence?"

"You're not..."

"Either way, I'd prefer if you didn't treat me as a test subject."

"I'm not treating you as a test subject."

"Really? Because you just called me a problem and it sounds as if you're preparing to write a thesis and right now you're going over the background."

Green scowled at me. "You're good at twisting and turning a conversation around, I'll give you that. It's not going to distract me from the point."

"There's a point?"

"Something terrible happened to you and you're letting it fester by not talking about it."

Vanessa slammed her laptop shut and turned to him.

"Listen here, you prissy little packwolf," she snarled. "You have your perfect family and your perfect friends and your perfect degree. Even if I did tell you my life story you wouldn't be able to comprehend it because you've never experienced less than perfect."

Green folded his arms over his chest and raised an eyebrow in a completely infuriating manner. "Try me."

"I don't want to try you!"

"Coward."

Vanessa froze. "What did you call me?"

Green tilted his head. "I called you a coward."

For a moment she couldn't breathe, couldn't think. Then she went for his throat.

"Not here," Green hissed, grabbing her before she reached his neck.

She didn't understand what he was saying. Fury had carried her way past her awareness of her surroundings. She'd forgotten they were in a café and that other people could see and hear them. Now that she bothered to look around, she could see that several of the other people in the café were staring at them.

Reluctantly, she sat back on her chair and took particular care placing her laptop in its case and sliding it into her bag. She tried to take deep breaths and keep her anger at bay. It was easier said than done when it tore at her like a wild beast inside her chest.

How dare he? How dare he, who knew nothing of real danger, call her a coward?

"You have no right to call me that," she ground out as she stood up and grabbed her bag.

"Don't I? You're so scared of revealing even the tiniest bit of yourself you've shut yourself off completely."

"I'm not shut off," Vanessa snapped, but Green clearly didn't listen. He got to his feet and towered over her as if his size would make him right.

"I'm willing to give you everything, but you keep pushing me away because you're scared I'll hurt you."

"I'm not scared of you!" Vanessa hissed.

"Aren't you? Because I've offered you my heart, body and soul and you're too much of a coward to give me even a glimpse of..."

"I'm not a coward! I just don't want you!"

Green pulled back as if she'd slapped him. "Liar," he said.

"It's not a lie! Fine, you want to do this? Let's do this," Vanessa said leaning forward. She might as well get it over with. She knew what she had to do and there was no point dragging it out. Especially not when he'd made her angry enough to not care about hurting his feelings. "And let's keep it civilized for the onlookers too. I, Vanessa Redding, reject you, Aiden Co..."

Before she could get the last syllables out his mouth crashed onto hers. This was no kiss of love or affection. It was pure desperation. An animalistic mix of fear and desire, anger and longing and it tore through her like a tornado.

Vanessa forgot that they were standing in the middle of a crowded café. She forgot that she wanted to tear his throat out for what he'd said, forgot all the excellent reasons for not being with him and her determination to set them both free completely vanished.

She kissed him back.