Spencer Reid x Reader Fluff Fics

Rail Me

Summary - Spencer Reid has been learning some new lingo...maybe the modern language isn't as easy as he thought. 

Trigger Warnings - strong language 

Word Count - 876

A/N - So the cover is a tweet I saw that I IMMEDIATELY  was inspired to write a fic about. So here it is! Enjoy <3

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"Goddamnit!" Spencer Reid slammed your fist on his side of the table, his coffee cup full of pens rattling. You peeked up nervously from your work. Spencer was usually a pretty cool and collected guy, but he, like everyone else, had a snapping point. This case had been hard for all of you, but especially Spencer. The police officers at the local precinct hated the fact that you all were here "intruding" on their investigation. The only reason the BAU had come was because the chief of the precinct had called in a favor with Emily. These officers were, unfortunately, the kinds of officers that thought they knew so much better than your team. So yeah, working with them wasn't exactly "working".

Spencer had been trying for the past fourteen hours to work with some of the officers to interpret the letters the unsub left at the crime scene. Well, he was supposed to, but in reality, he had made absolutely no progress today since the officer he was supposed to be working with had taken an impromptu day off and mysteriously taken all of his files with him, including the letters. Therefore, instead of Spencer actually being able to work today, he had basically just been sitting in the cold, hard, uncomfortable chairs for basically eternity with absolutely nothing to do and nothing to do about it.

"Spencer?" you said quietly.

"What, Y/N?" The best way to describe Spencer's tone of voice was "exasperated", which you had kind of expected after fourteen hours of basically staring into the void.

"Do you want to maybe take a break or something? Maybe get some fresh air and dinner or something?"

"Y/N, I have been on a break all goddamn day. I've been here for a whole goddamn day and I have not done a single bit of work. So no, I don't think taking a break is that great of an idea."

You walked over to Spencer's side of the table and placed your hand on his shoulder. Usually, when you did that, you could feel his shoulders relax and the tension ease up, but not today. Rather, he sort of shrugged you off a bit.

"Come on, Spencer," you said. "Just for a few minutes-"

"Y/N, not now."

Of course, you being the truly most stubborn person you knew, you just had to keep pestering him. You tugged at his sleeves slightly, trying to get him to move out of his seat. Unfortunately, and quite predictably, Spencer had had enough of this infuriating day and just absolutely lost his shit.

"God, Y/N, shut up or I'll rail you!" he shouted.

You stopped dead in your tracks and just blinked. "Spencer, what did you say?"

Instantly, Spencer's hand covered his mouth and his eyes widened. "Sorry, sorry, I don't know why I said that! It-it just sort of came out."

"Spencer, stop apologizing. What did you say?"

"Shut up or I'll rail you?"

You had to stifle a laugh with a fake cough. He couldn't be serious...right? "Spencer, tell me, what do you think 'shut up or I'll rail you' means?"

"I mean, I'm pretty sure 'shut up' is a pretty self-explanatory exclamation. But 'rail me' just means that you're going to hit someone with a train...right?"

Your head was exploding. As Spencer's coworker, you personally witnessed Spencer's amazing mind at work, but you had to admit that there were moments when you wondered if he truly was a genius. This was definitely one of those moments.

"Oh Spencer. Oh Spencer, sweetheart, no," you said. Spencer cocked his head curiously like a little cat as you stroked his hair sweetly. You motioned for him to come closer and Spencer leaned over. With a hand cupped at the corner of your mouth, you whispered softly in his ear, "It means you want to fuck me."

You stepped back and looked at Spencer's albeit shocked face. His mouth was agape and he was absolutely speechless. All of the laughter that you had been withholding for the time being came barrelling out, you doubling over in laughter and nearly rolling on the floor of the precinct. Meanwhile, Spencer had sat back down after being frozen from embarrassment, staring at the ground as he seemingly contemplated his entire life.

After you recovered from your laughing fit, you got back on your feet and peeked over to Spencer.

"You okay, Spencer?"

"I hate everything," Spencer groaned. His cheeks and ears had enflamed to a bright pink.

You just had to tease him. Not teasing Spencer would be such a waste, especially when an opportunity this good presented itself. "Aw, Spencer, you don't have to be embarrassed. I always knew you had a little thing for me, but gosh, Spence, I never thought you wanted that!" you said, feigning shock. "Well I'm gonna go back home for the night, in case you were curious."

You winked as you picked up your jacket and swung it over your shoulder. As you strutted out, Spencer scrambled to his feet and shouted explanations while the rest of the precinct stared at the both of you. Oh you could not wait to tease Spencer about this all over again tomorrow morning.