LUCID

CHAPTER 12

I found myself stumbling through a wood, heading down a steep embankment to a road below in the clearing. I was aware I was dreaming, and I was also aware of two silent figures watching me from higher up between the trees.

As I came out of the shrubbery I saw a woman crouched at the side of the road. She turned when she heard me approach. It was Anika. She jumped up and flung her arms around me. "Thank god!" she cried. She'd been weeping and I could feel her body trembling as I held her.

"What's the matter – what happened?"

"They took Kiefer."

"Who took him? Where?"

She broke away and pointed to a house that was standing alone in a field on the other side of the road. It was a weathered shack of a building, with boarded-up windows. Couldn't have had more than a couple of rooms inside. The remains of a crumbled porch led to the front door which was boarded up too with thick planks. The field was barren and dry, with traces of the crop that had once grown there – broken stalks of dead corn-plants stuck out of the ground like stubble on a badly-shaved chin. Similar fields stretched out to the horizon, but there wasn't another building anywhere to be seen.

"Tell me what happened."

"We were just walking," she sobbed, "then they appeared from nowhere, about six of them, they surrounded us. They snatched Kiefer and dragged him into the house. They told me not to follow or they would kill him. I didn't know what to do."

"Who were they?"

"I don't know, people... just people!"

"Right... I'm going in to get him."

"Be careful."

"Tell them that!"

I had no idea what to expect but I couldn't have cared less. I wasn't concerned about my own safety. They had my son, so now they'd have to deal with his father.

I got close to the house, ready to kick the front door right in, when I noticed a side-door that wasn't boarded up. I was taken completely by surprise when I opened it and walked in. I found myself in a small kitchen. An old coloured lady sat at a table shelling peas over a saucepan. She looked up as I entered, held my gaze for a moment, then nodded her head in the direction of the door behind her. I passed her and went through it.

I was in a long corridor – much too long to fit inside the space of the house. Closed doors lined the length on both sides. I walked to the end and turned into another long corridor. At the end of that, another. I was in a maze. Behind some of the closed doors I heard mumblings and groaning, sometimes squeals of the terrifying sort. Some doors were open – behind those I saw figures of wretched, lost individuals, rocking side to side in chairs, or standing motionless in corners and facing bare walls. Some watched me as I looked in, their eyes dead and soulless.

I called out Kiefer's name as I walked deeper into the maze, hoping to hear his reply. I didn't... but I did sense his presence. I let myself be guided by that sense, and it led me finally to the room he was in. I felt heartbroken when I saw him – six years old again, crouching under a table, scared and whimpering, clutching his favourite stuffed-toy cheetah...

"Papaaaaa!"

I scooped him up into my arms, almost crushing him with my embrace. All the emotions I'd felt from the times he was a child flooded through me. Even though my son is now a grown man, strong and independent, and even though I love him as much as ever, I still miss the child he once was. And despite knowing I was in a dream, the child in my arms right then was my son too, and I was responsible for him as much as I ever was.