JUST IN TIME

UNRESOLVED ISSUES

This is it. This is the reason why in the first place I didn't want RP to enter the limelight. God. I didn't know I won't be ready for this.

I immediately called my contacts so all the articles will be taken down. They did!

But I am still so angry.

I keep scrolling Facebook and I found another article. Jennie's statement. She was asked if we're romantically together.

"No. Lisa and I are not together anymore like we used to be. We're building a good friendship for our son."

And I don't know why this hurt me more. God. I am so hurt.

Jen and Rion arrived at my house just few minutes after I got here.

"Ri, I am asking you if you can deactivate your Instagram? You're still too young for that. " I said seriously. He knows I'm mad but I try not to raise my voice.

"But Dada, I'm already 9. If you think that I got affected with all their bashings, well, I want to assure you that I am fine. Mom already talked to me about this and she taught me how to handle my personal life and not to let bashers eat me." He defended himself.

"You're just a kid. Listen to me. I don't want you to get hurt." I said. Jennie is so afraid of me right now. She knows that I am just controlling my anger.

"Hurt? Don't you think I'm not used to it? You raised me to be brave, right?" He said. Jennie looked down.

"Ri, I'm sorry." Jennie apologized to him again.

"Mom, Da, can I just go to my room now? Please do not worry. It will all fade away. Please? Trust me on this." He said and walked upstairs to his room.

I shook my head and went to my room too.

Jennie followed me and insisting that we should talk.

"Lis, let's talk please? I am sorry. Okay. From now on, I'll ask you anything first before I teach or say something to Rion. I swear, I laid all the consequences to him first when he asked me if he can post our photos together in Liverpool." She is explaining.

"So, you denied me again?" Shit. Lisa, where is that coming from and why are you bringing this up?

"Lis, you wanted me to lie? You know, I actually do not know what's going to happen to us. Do you think this is easy for me? I want you. I want you back. Lisa, I am still in love with you. But you know to yourself that you are so confused. Am I right? I couldn't blame you if you don't want me anymore." She said crying.

"Love? Do you have that? Really? Do you know what does that mean?" I said and she leaned on the wall. Weak. Trying to compose herself.

"Okay, Lisa. I know and I understand that you are still angry at me. You think I deserve a punishment? Do it! If declining the Chanel project would make you feel fine, okay do it. What else? What do you really want? You want me to beg?" She said crying.

I sat on the bed, rubbing my head and my nape. God. My mind is like exploding right now. Shit. I don't even know what's inside my head.

"Give me your body. Let me do whatever I want to do with you. I hate myself. No matter how I try to stop thinking about you, all these years, you're still running inside my mind. And it hurts so much that I am still in love with you even if you left me." I am not in control even of my mouth.