Lustra~ f. weasley

Chapter 50

The night the Mackin children arrived back at Hogwarts, Nathan felt off. He laid in his bed in his private prefect dorm while Riley sat beside him, staring down at him in worry.

"It's rude to stare." He mused, turning his head slightly to look at her.

"I worry about you... what's going on in that head of yours?" Riley murmured, softly running her hands through his hair.

"Nothing to worry about mi amor, just a lot going on." Nathan said, shrugging off her concern.

"Talk to me then. You know you can always talk to me." Riley said as he sent her a soft smile, leaning up to give her a quick kiss.

"I know I can, it was just hard with everything that happened with my Dad." Nathan sighed out as Riley just nodded, wanting him to open up to her as she knows he has a hard time doing so.

"I bet it was difficult, but Chris was there, wasn't he?" Riley asked as he nodded.

"Thankfully so. I had to be so strong for Elle and Jackson, it was refreshing to see him."

"So what happened? Your Dad is alright now, hm?" She murmured out as he only slightly nodded.

"Physically, yeah, but obviously it's a lot tougher for him mentally."

"I could only imagine."

"I just hate it, you know, my Dad puts all this pressure on me to be the best big brother, and to always protect Elle, and now Jackson as he is officially a Mackin, but no one realizes how tough it is to always be the strong one, the one who always has to do right by others as if I don't ever get to mess up, or not be the strong one." Nathan muttered out.

"Have you tried talking to your Dad about it?" Riley asked as Nathan let out a sigh.

"It's no use. I know my Dad loves us all, a lot, but it's different. Elle and I are only a year apart and yet we grew up very differently. My Dad wanted me to grow up with the 'be a man' ideology and how I should always be strong, protect the people around me and god do I try to be that but it never feels like enough. After everything that happened with my Dad's sister-" Nathan started before getting cut off.

"Sister? I've read your family history in the daily profit and nowhere does it say anything about a sister, only Johnathan the death eater and Ben the highly respected Auror." Riley asked as Nathan nodded.

"My Dad doesn't like talking about it, at all, so this has to stay between us but he had a little sister, Giselle, that's actually who Elle was named after, and during the first war, she was killed right in front of him. He tried to save her, but it was just the two of them versus like a million death eaters. She died trying to protect him because he already had two kids and she didn't want us to grow up without a father so she jumped in front of him and the killing curse hit her instead. My Mum and a few others then found them and helped my Dad fight them off but I know he never got over it. He saw it as she died doing what he should have done, she was his little sister and he loved her so much and she died right in front of him. He doesn't like talking about it but it really messes with him." Nathan revealed as Riley's eyes went wide.

"I had no idea..."

"Yeah, that's why she's not talked about in the paper or anything, Rita Skeeter might be trash in every other way but she knows not to bring up Giselle, or else my Dad would absolutely lose it. He lost a part of himself that day and never healed. That's why he's so tough on me to take care of Elle. He says he knows how it feels to wake up each day with guilt that he couldn't protect his little sister and doesn't want me to feel the same way. He practically raised Giselle so I don't know, it affected him as a person."