Patterns of Parting Ways

2 | Tristan

It's too warm in here, the thick layer of sweat on my forehead making it apparent as I wipe at it with the back of my hand. Rhea doesn't help as she sits on the edge of my lap, her body aggressively moving to the music. She's wearing that tight black mini dress, the one she knows I like and her dark hair is pulled tightly into a ponytail.

"Isn't this fun?" She screams into my ear.

Her mascara is smudged slightly under her eyes and the red lipstick she applied early has disappeared now. I nod slightly. But no this isn't exactly what I'd like to call fun. The music's too loud here, too dramatic, and the club is rammed full of sweaty swaying bodies. This is definitely not fun.

Rhea leans onto me, one hand on my chest and the other grabs a fistful of my hair, pulling me closer to her. I can feel the tickle of her breath on my cheek as she presses her lips to mine and I drag her further onto my lap, deepening the kiss. Rhea's body has turned fully to me now, her legs wrapping around my waist as she rocks back and fourth slowly, teasing me.

My hands runs up and down her petite body, stopping at all of the right places for a moment until they become too greedy and move elsewhere. She bites down hard on my bottom lip and looks up at me with big brown eyes that are full of so much temptation, full of so much desire. "Baby?" She whispers into my ear and plants a few small kisses down my neck.

I grab her hips this time, guiding her up and down and her lips are finally back on mine. And although this is making the club somewhat more bearable, this doesn't mean anything. Rhea doesn't really mean anything to me, it's just comfortable. It's just comfortable to have someone to go to, someone who can distract me from the unthinkable things. Comfortable to have someone to kiss on nights like this. "I love you." She licks the side of my mouth, her hand just inches away for the zipper of my jeans.

And maybe she means it. But it makes my stomach knot, the feeling is definitely not mutual. Sure she's my girlfriend, but that doesn't mean I feel the same way. It doesn't mean I like her like that. She's just company, for now.

I'm grateful she doesn't see how my jaws locks and how my chests begins to tighten. I do my best to match Rhea's devilish grin and I'm grateful when she doesn't ask why I don't say it back.

"Get a room for God's sake, before I have to gouge my eyes out." Kai says sitting beside me, a fresh drink in hand.

Kai and I have been friends since the start of high school, but like Rhea, I think my relationship with Kai has remained so consistent out of connivence, rather than enjoyment. Kai can be a bit of an ass at the best of times. He's blunt and rude, and often acts out impulsively before thinking. Some of us don't have that privilege anymore.

Kai is just another distraction, another person I can pretend that I'm okay with. Another person I can pretend that I'm in control to.

Rhea reluctantly climbs off of my body, puffing out her bottom lip and crossing her arms across her chest, "Kai, you're such a party pooper." And I can only agree.

He shrugs her off and takes a big sip of his drink. Rhea takes my hands in hers and attempts to pull me from my seat. I'm more than ten inches taller than her and more than double her strength so I don't budge. "Come on. Dance with me." She rolls her eyes and places her hands on her hips, her bottom lip puffed out again, she's acting like a child.

Dancing in this club, letting sweaty bodies invade my personal space, attempting to keep in time with this awful electric music, was definitely something I had planned on not doing tonight. I shake my head and Kai shrugs pulling out his phone and pretending he's not listening. Kai doesn't plan on dancing either. "Fine. Be boring." Rhea says storming into the crowd, and just like that she disappears into the mass of heated bodies.