Loveless Beauty (Completed)

Chapter XVI: All in head?!

Shoutout for Magical_Community

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Who would have thought coffee with your husband can be this awkward. Where you have to sit stiff on your expensive chair and think a thousand times before acting. Cause you can't embarrass your company with your ways. 

Gashmir suggested this stupid suffosticated expensive place for our coffee. Just cause he can't risk media caughting him. Ugh! I can't believe him, he wasn’t even that famous. He also denied going to Chao Mao saying he don't prefer such places. Obnoxious, pompous jerk.

The dire need of an excuse to leave was so high that I couldn't express it. But whenever I tried my escape, the jerks denied saying it's rude to leave the guest. When they are the definition of rude. Also, I don't remember being their host. These punk, seriously. I would never invite myself over coffee with anyone. Gashmir and Kanan have ruined that for me.

Heaven only knows, why am I pinning others for the things getting ruined by my actions and words. When it was my idea. I have this habit of landing myself in trouble. 

Ringing of the phone caught my attention as well as theirs. My heart inflates looking at the caller ID. A huge smile finds its way to my lips. Without giving it another thought, I said, "I have to take this. It's really important." Then swiped my finger across the screen and left to talk.

"Hey, I hope you're delivering it in two days, right?! You can't think how desperate I am to start with it. I am elated to just___ you know, aah! I can't explain." I chuckled, feeling enthusiastic with the news I was about to get from sakash. 

Sakash and I met at Mood Indigo last year. Yeah, he is an IITian. We have kept in contact with each other. He was just so intelligent that I can't help but got attracted to him. Actually, his intelligence. We discuss inventions, upcoming projects, and new ideas. One day I told him about my final year's project idea and he decided to help me. From then we both are working on it. And he was delivering this device he made for my project model.

"Uhh___ Keya, about that," his hesitating voice confused me. Had he not finished with it?! He can take some more time if he wants. That's my final year project. I have got a year for that. Then what was he dubious about?!

"Sakash, do you want some more time?! There's no urgency. You___" I began but got cut off.

"Sorry Keya, I finished it but sold it to someone. They were paying me a huge amount. And I was in need of money. So, yeah. I___ I just agreed to give them that." 

His words left me agitated. How could he sell the thing he made for me?! And money?! I would have given it to him as well. More, if he was in need of it. Then how could he__?! God, he offered me help. He promised me. I thought we were friends. Do friends sell promises today?! Maybe, otherwise it doesn't explain his behavior. But who am I to judge him?! Perhaps the need for money has forced him to do so.

I don't know what to say. I don't want to give false comfort that I didn't get hurt by his actions. But I was in no place to berate him. His needs were his priority afterall. And it was his right to decide and choose that. So, I end the call by pressing red.

I bite my trembling lips from sobbing. Looking out of the floor to ceiling window, I wondered if there will be anyone in this world who will put me first. I have no idea where this thought came to my mind. But it did.

The people who cared about me left me behind. My father died when I was four or five. I don’t remember much but know that he was a father to a daughter who would want by their side. Then there was my daddu who raised me like a brat I was. And next he married me to a complete stranger before dying. What could explain the sudden actions behind this.

Clutching the mobile in my hand, I heaved a deep breath. I never indulged doesn't mean I didn't think about it. But, who would want to waste their youth on the questions that have no answer. I snickered, reasoning I wouldn't. 

Seriously, will there be anyone that will be there only for me?! 

Glancing around I saw a young couple sitting at a table. Their flirtatious stances were saying it all. They were absolutely in love with each other. Pouring all the love, they were feeding each other. Ugh!! These damn romantic people. Why can't they keep their romance to their rooms?! Is it necessary to smack it on others faces who are struggling with their secret marriage. 

"It's rude to stare at others food. If you wanted I would have bought it for you." Irritation swept off me, leaving me flustered. Until now, I didn't realized I was glaring at two strangers. I swear I wouldn't embarrass myself. But, something's wrong with me. And ofcourse Gashmir will think I was staring at their food. Only you Gashmir, only you could think that.

I turned to gave Gashmir my blankest blank look. If he thinks that it was a good joke. He has another thing coming his way. By the way he was frowning I guess he wasn't joking. 

Just then I ascertain something was missing, or rather someone. Like Kanan Ojha. 

"Where's ____" I stopped, glowering,  uncertain of Gashmir's regale. Am I somehow entertaining him?! And just like a mind reader he answered me, "he left."

"Then what are we waiting for?!" I bleat, slightly irritated. Embarrassed by my behavior. Also I get the reason behind Gashmir's regale. Afff! What was I thinking glaring at those strangers?! 

"Oh, that ___" I cut him off, " don't answer."

During our ride back to college hostel, it was all in my head. Thinking of where I felt short. That sakash thought it was okay to deceive me. Some will think that it's not that big deal. May not be for everyone. However, for me it was my friendship, my trust on sakash. That he broke so effortlessly. Why he would choose money over our friendship. Not that we were besties. But we had this close friendship. Atleast that was what I thought. We had so much fun doing this project together. Guess, I was wrong. Was it a mistake?! 

A sigh left my mouth and I noticed my ride wasn't moving. Has something happened to car?! Glancing Gashmir's way, I realized he was already staring at me. Perflexed, I whipped my neck other way. My heart couldn't have picked up it's beating for nothing. Why has he stopped the car and looking at me?! Was he planning on abandoning me for my embarrassing behavior earlier?! Cause, I can't take anymore today. 

I turned to talk him, already bushed. But the thing that tied my tongue were the familiar surrounding. Furrowing my brows, I stared over Gashmir's shoulder, out of the window. M hostels backside came to my view. That's when it got to me, we have reached our destination.

"Oh, we have reached." I said, unbuckling my seatbelt. Only to be stopped by the person beside.

Puzzled, I raised a brow at him. But the way he was intently staring at me formed lump in my throat. I gulped, mumbling, "I should be going first." 

His lack of response, had me say, "ugh___ Gashmir, do you perhaps want something?!"

The deficit of communication led to further silence in the car. Sometimes I don't get Gashmir. Who am I kidding?! I really never get Gashmir. Like now, the way he kept looking at me. His expressions unreadable, his eyes vacuous. Like, he don't give a shit of my life. Then why was his actions suggesting otherwise. 

"What's the matter?" My confusion was written all over my face as he further explained, "we have been sitting here in this unmoving car for fifteen minutes. If you haven't noticed."

Really? Was I that lost?! "umm___ oh!" were the only words left my mouth.

Hastily I unfastened the seatbelt as Gashmir has taken his hands back. I was about to get out of the vehicle, when he repeated the question, "what's the matter?!"

Was that concern I saw on his face. He don't pry. Atleast hadn't before. Then why today?! What had him changed his mind. Just because he was asking I shouldn't open upto him. God knows he was asking to laugh on me. I shouldn't believe on this facade. 

"You shouldn’t be the one to care about that. Sorry I kept you waited," with that said, I left his car.