𝙎𝙪𝙞𝙘𝙞𝙙𝙖𝙡_ 𝓢𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓚𝓪𝓶𝓲

ℙ𝕒𝕣𝕥 𝟡

The officers said they couldn't do anything for her to stop haunting my dreams, but they said I could talk to her.

Hitoshi held my hand tighter. <<Are you sure?>>, he asked.

I looked down and nodded. <<I want to get in there>>.

He squeezed my hand and then let go. <<I'm waiting for you right here, okay? Call me if you need anything>>, he said, placing a quick kiss on my forehead. 

I nodded again.

When they opened the door, I saw her immediately. She was sitting on the bench, looking the same as the day before. No, not the same... she had puffy red eyes and her hair was messy.

<<M-mom...?>>, I called her.

She turned her face to look at me. <<Denki>>.

I didn't know what to say. <<H-how are you, mom?>>, I asked, awkwardly. I looked around. The bars separating me from her were encrusted in rust and there was dust everywhere.

She scoffed. <<How do I seem to feel? Are you blind?>>, she asked. Her makeup had trickled down her cheeks.

<<Right...>>, I nodded. <<I'm sorry, mom>>, I said.

<<Just... why? Why did you report me?!>>.

<<It wasn't my intention, but...>>. I looked down at my hands, hiding the bandages under the sleeves of Hitoshi's sweater.

<<But what, Denki?!>>, she yelled, angrily.

<<IT BECAME TOO MUCH!>>, I yelled back, starting to tear up. 

I sealed my eyes closed. 

<<It became too much...>>, I repeated, this time in a whisper. I frowned, attempting not to cry. <<I know I look exactly the same as he used to>>, I snapped, my voice slightly cracking. <<I know I have his quirk. I know I remind you of him, but it's not my fault. I know that since dad left you've been feeling bad, but it's not my fault, mom>>.

Silence. 

I could almost feel the noise of my heart beat. 

<<Denki...>>, she called weakly.

I looked at her and winced, suddenly feeling the urge to hug her.

She was literally sobbing in front of me. She had never shown me this weak part of her. She had always been distant and never cared to show me some affection or teach me how to behave when I felt weak myself. 

<<I'm sorry...>>, she whispered, holding her face.

I blinked a few times. <<W-what...?>>.

<<I'm sorry, my son...>>, she repeated. She was covering her eyes with her hands, her chest shaking in sobs. <<I'm sorry...>>.

<<Mom... don't cry>>, I said, walking closer to her. <<I'm alright. You're going to be alright too...>>.

<<I...>>, she started, her yellow eyes staring right into mine. <<I don't have the words to apologize... you will never forgive me for what I did...>>.

I shook my head. <<No, no mom. You're wrong>>, I said, my lips parting in a smile. <<I had already forgiven you the first time you... did that>>. I was aware of her feelings since I was a kid. My smile turned sad. <<Mom... I wish I could hug you right now>>, I murmured, looking down.

Another sob shook her chest as she studied my face, looking almost like she was seeing me for the first time. <<Hug... I never hugged my own son...>>. Her makeup had gotten even worse than before. <<I'm sorry for saying all those stupid things to you... I don't mean one of those, get that? Everything I said...>>.

I smiled brightly again, raising both thumbs. <<No big deal, mom!>>. 

I didn't notice the sleeves of Hitoshi's sweater had lowered and were showing the bandages.

Her gaze moved onto my arms. <<W-what did you do there...?>>, she asked.

I covered the bandages by moving the sleeve higher and smiled brighter, hiding my wrists behind my back. <<Nothing! Just... training at school!>>.

Her eyes turned sadder. <<Denki... please show me what's under those bandages>>, she pleaded, pointing at my arms.

<<Seriously, it's nothing you have to worry about>>, I shook my head. <<No big deal>>, I repeated, my smile beginning to fade a bit.

She backed off, shocked and in pain. That single step backwards made me feel alone again. <<Denki... did you cut yourself?>>. She was asking me directly, looking at me in the eyes and showing her concern. <<Did you cut yourself... because of me?>>, she asked in a whisper.

I looked down. 

It's pointless to keep lying, now. Also, she must know what I'm going through, right? She's my mom... 

I scratched the back of my neck. I just couldn't deny it anymore. I nodded slowly, not willing to look at her. <<It wasn't just because of you, though...>>, I admitted.

She sobbed loudly once more. <<Please... show me>>.

<<What? Why?>>, I asked, surprised. Mom wants... to see the cuts?!

<<I want to see how much I failed as a mother>>, she answered, her voice breaking once again.

My eyes were wide open and I stayed like that for a few seconds. 

Then I looked down and insecurely took Hitoshi's sweater off, revealing the whole bandage on both arms. I started undoing it, wrapping the white cloth on my fingers to not let it get dirty. I took it off my left arm completely, soon moving to my right arm, where I did the same. Then I sighed and showed her the whole thing, reaching out. 

Some of those cuts had already cicatrized and had become white stripes on my porcelain skin. Others were still almost bleeding, contrasting my pale complexion.

She looked at both my arms covering her mouth with her hands, gasping quietly. Then she looked at me in the eyes. <<Denki... please, tell me the truth. Did you do other things? Did you do other things... to yourself? Please tell me the truth...>>.

I looked down. <<To be sincere... something else happened. I... I tried to jump off of UA's roof>>, I confessed, making her almost faint. <<B-b-but then, s-someone saved me!>>, I quickly said, shaking my hands in front of me. <<A-a beautiful person, o-outside and inside. They convinced me that killing myself was not the right way to end my nightmare. They told me I needed to find another way out, they're basically the reason why I'm still alive. They're out there, waiting for me to... come out>>, I added, pointing at the door.

We both stayed in silence for a bit, then mom's voice was heard.

<<Can I meet them?>>.