Battlecry | Criminal Minds (gxg)

Chapter 15

The word first doesn't get lost on Elle. So I keep going. I tell her everything—how I turned him in, how we lost contact when he went to juvy. How I lost myself for a while, but managed to pull through. Then, college. The FBI. Serial killings. Bodies on top of bodies and crime scene photos burning my eyes. For two years we hunted him. Two goddamn years. And at the end, when we finally got him...

We're both crying when I finish the story. My voice cracks and breaks and dulls to a whisper, but I don't stop until I've told her all of it. Even what happened on the pier last night—and fifteen years ago. Something I never told anyone other than Andrew.

When I'm done, I wait for her to say something. Anything. She's stayed silent the entire time, listening to every word. And now, the way she looks at me, like I'm completely broken...

"Say something," I beg her.

"I... I understand," she says slowly.

"Understand what?"

"Why you didn't tell me. Carli, I—" Her voice breaks. I slide closer to her on the couch, our hands still intertwined. "I'm so sorry," she whispers. "I'm sorry I pushed you."

I shake my head, a hand reaching up to wipe away her tears. "No," I breathe. "Don't you dare apologize. You had every right to want to know. Every right."

She lets out a sob. I pull her closer, kissing away a tear that slides down her cheek. She grabs my neck, holding my forehead to hers. "I love you," she whispers. "I love you, Carli. No matter what happened to you in your past. No matter what... what he did to you."

It's my turn to reel in a sob. I crush her in a hug, our bodies trembling with emotion. I can't find words to tell her how overwhelming it is. My love for her. How it ripples through me, flows through every pore. How it managed to get through the years of walls surrounding my heart and make a home inside.

When we finally separate we snuggle up on the couch, our arms wrapped around each other and my head on her shoulder.

"What do we do now?" she asks.

"Stay alive."

Her arms tighten around me. "You have to."

"I'll try to."

"No." She shakes her head. "No trying. You—I can't—" She cuts off. Takes a deep breath. "I can't lose you, Carli. I need you. So please, stay alive."

I don't look her in the eye as I respond, "I will. And so will you."

"Okay," she breathes.

"Okay."

"And the team?"

"They know nothing. Not even Hotch."

She kisses my hair. "We'll tell them when you want to. Not before."

I don't respond. Only nod my head against her.

"Is he coming for us?" she asks some time later.

"Yes," I answer honestly. Nothing but the truth between us from now on.

"When?"

"I don't know," I admit. "He hasn't started killing yet. Likely securing old assets. But it'll start soon. And then..."

"He'll come for you," she finishes.

I roll into her, looking her in the eye. "It'll be the last mistake he ever makes."

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Elle drags me out to the woods for a run. I protest, of course, but she's convinced the fresh air will help. And that we'll have a better place to talk without worrying about watchful eyes and ears.