Loneliness

26 5 7
                                    

TW: Dark thoughts
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Somedays it's just the loneliness
That inexplicable feeling
Of not knowing what you want
Or where you are today
Or where you will be tomorrow
Till a point where you start to doubt
If life really is worth everything
Worth all that you struggle everyday with
Trust me, it's not sadness
It's not unhappiness either
It's just nothingness
The numbing nothingness
Like a void that sucks me in
And leaves me gasping
Gasping for air, for life, for sanity
Trust me its not like any other loneliness
Those loneliness had a purpose
Now there's none
And yet I can't explain
Why I feel
What I feel
And I just know that this feeling
Is bad, worse, worst and no one
Should have to go through these lows
These episodes where
Life ceases to portray a meaning
And the loneliness is just suffocating
Like a python around your throat
And worst part is when
You can't give a reason to your sanity
On why you feel insane
You just know that you do
That you cry, that you scream
And that you muffle those screams
Behind a mask of neutrality
And you slap a sticker smile
On that fake face
Bleeding, draining, just exhausted
You just want to curl up
And go to sleep

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