Callie Rose

Chapter 22

Great.

I quickly rushed to the stove and began dishing the pasta before Evan had a chance to help me and laid two plates on the table for us.

   I hear him chuckle behind me as he wraps both of his arms around my waist, probably amused by my actions. He kisses me on the cheek before asking if I needed any help, which I declined.

Soon enough we were both sitting on the couch and eating food, moved it here because the formality of eating at a table was just too awkward. After a while of making conversation anxiousness from earlier starts to build up inside of me.

     No doubt he noticed a change in my expression before I could even speak. That was one thing about Evan he's a very good observer.

     "Evan I have something to tell you"

"Everything okay Rosie?" He asked setting his plate down and turning to me, a more serious look on his face now.

     "Yeah e- everything's great I just really needed..., to talk"

     As if it was not really possible he trained his body even more to me, his attention becoming trapped and body language fully attentive.

     I sat there just staring for a second. How would I even begin this conversation I had no idea how to phrase it to him without this whole situation turning into something that couldn't be controlled, not that I had much of a hope of Evan not lashing out in the first place.

     After looking for the right words I found that I still don't even know what to say. This was... Impossible. I found myself wanting to tell Evan the truth I wanted to tell him how I loved him and how I never wanted to leave him, I wanted to tell him how my parents were blackmailing me and how I was terrified that if we stayed together any longer I would be the cause for anything bad that happened to him in the future.

     There were a lot of things I wanted to say but I realized and knew that by doing that I was being selfish and right now I needed Evan to be safe even if it meant us being apart.

     "While I was growing up I never really had any friends. I know that sounds lonely and somewhat depressing but I wasn't bothered. In fact, I was content with being alone. And though most of the time I was occupied, whether by school work given to me by tutors or even extracurricular activities I always felt alone. I thought maybe I was destined to be that way, everyone around me had somebody to be with even my parents- as vain as they were had each other and they loved each other. I felt like nobody loved me and in all truthfulness, I felt as if I was incapable of loving anybody"

  For the first time since I started speaking I look up into Evan's eyes, not to see his reaction but for him to look back into mine and for him to feel and downright view everything I'm feeling.

     "But after meeting you I know now that that's not true because I love you"

     For a second I want to dip my head back down in case of rejection, I don't know whether it's because I feel as if after this we won't ever be the same but my head is still up with my eyes gazing very intensely into his. I don't waste too much time trying to read his apparently frozen body language so as to not falter my confidence, instead, I keep on going.

  "I-I love you so much and I'm so grateful to you for making me feel this way and for caring about me the way no one ever has."

     I'm almost crying now because of the next words that I have to say but I stand my ground if Evan knew I didn't want to leave that would make it even more difficult to go. But unexpectedly before I can even mutter out the next sentence arms are grabbing mine, lifting me up the chair and into a body and soon my lips are being morphed together with soft eager ones.