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━━ FROM ASHES TO ASHES
I DIDN'T THINK IT WOULD hurt so much.
I've felt my mind tearing before, I thought I would know what it would truly be like to happen again. I tore myself from the inside out when I was with Shaw, when he cupped my cheek in his ice cold palm and whispered sweet nothings into my ear. I tore apart as he declared himself a god and me his angel. I thought I would know, I thought I could handle it.
I was wrong.
I can barely see, eyes watering so badly the world is a blurry haze. My hands grapple with the side of my head, as if holding them over my ears will somehow will away the knives digging through my flesh. Both Logan and I lay beside each other, my other hand still on his cheek. I want to pull it away, I need to pull it away. Any more of this and I truly will die.
The images won't stop, the whispers growing louder and louder until they hammer the inside of my skull, pounding their shadowy fists against the side of my skull.
I scream. Tears stream down my face.
I can't do this, I can't do this, I can't do this. STOP, I scream silently, my throat ripped to shreds.
"Leena." Logan's spluttering voice causes me to turn. Someone is holding onto me, their fingers wrapping around my hands. I push them away, but they're firm, and soon my fingers leave Logan's skin. It does nothing to ease the pounding in my skull, the shredding in my head.
"Leena," an accented voice calls out. I slump against Charles, shaking. "Leena, come on." I shake my head. So tired, I think dully, I'm so tired. "Leena, Leena, please, come on. Erik—" My eyes snap open. The room spins from where I lay on the floor, held up in Charles' arms. I stagger away, my knees buckling and palms aching. He keeps a firm hand on my back.
"What?" I splutter out. "What's going on."
"Leena, it's Erik." Charles says. "He's going to kill Raven." My eyes widen, the pain easing. Logan's still writhing on the floor. "I can't—" he looks so helpless. "I can't help, my powers..."
He lets me sit up, and that's when I become aware of the screams. A thousand different voices, both out loud and in their minds, scream out in unison. The fear, oh god, the fear, it eats me up. There's too much of it, putrid and clear as day. The shadows burn, inching along my hands, swirling into my palms. Charles' eyes widen as they pool to the floor. I can't pull them back, as it's taking everything in me to keep the rest inside.
"Where is he?" I manage to say, holding onto Charles' forearm so tightly I think I might be cutting off his circulation.
"He's gone after her," Charles replies, his voice thick. "Leena, he's gone after Raven." I sit up, my muscles straining. The pain has lessened, and when I look over, I can see Logan picking himself up, moving his hands towards his face. Confusion clouds his mind like fog, piercing through the agony. It allows me a second to breathe, and I'm able to stand fully with Charles' help.
