Feelings On Paper

With You and Vise Versa

dressed in comfortable clothes that hide my body,
i joke of death and the never ending sadness with a smile on my face,
relating to your cynical sarcasm,
and wondering if this is okay.

wearing clothes to impress and accentuate what you love,
i whisper suggestions to your ear with a smirk on display,
relating to your social optimism,
and wondering if this is okay.

chains wrapped around my waist and ripped fabric covering whats necessary,
i declare that everything is okay reminding you of my strength,
worry on my mind as you seem relieved,
and wondering if this is okay.

i dress for occasion,
each occasion being a different person.
i speak what i know you want to hear,
empathizing with what i barely grasp.
i hide what's true,
because your satisfaction is above my own.

every persona changes,
inconsistent as it is not the real me.
for when i am alone,
i am a blank slate.

still and stiff,
i'll write of what would impress.

huff and puff,
as i lay watching everyone live through this addictive screen.

scoff and cough,
being productive at all times for there is someone to impress.

even alone,
i cannot fail.
if i were to make a mistake,
everyone would know.
if i were to stop,
it would only be for rest.
but when sleep ponders and fails to take over,
the thoughts take charge and the cycle of unnecessary productivity begins again.

with you,
i am who you want me to be.
alone,
i am no one.