Nothing was the same after the Second Mushroom War. Ooo, after just over five years of existence, was scattered around the globe, on a distant planet called Earth. We had to become humans.
I hadn't seen a human for so, so long. I was on my travels when the Lich succeeded in destroying Ooo. When everyone had to flee.
Sometimes, living in what is called Bern, I would catch sight of a creature masquerading as a human. Lady Rainicorn, who I knew vaguely before the demise of Ooo, was pretending to be a young international student with degree in art. Mr Cupcake was a body-builder from England.
An Escape, a creature that escaped the Lich's terrible purge, was easily detected by another Escape. We wore holograms that altered our appearance. Only someone who is accustomed to the technology would be able to tell when another creature was using one.
I was doing nicely in Bern. I had a nice little chalet in the mountains, where I could more or less be myself. I lived alone. I tried to contact Simon, as he was technically a human, but I had no idea where he lived. So I was on my own. I could float out of my house, drink red in my garden and never touch the sun. I was safe.
I yawn, and reach for my alarm. Six PM. One of the reasons I chose Alpine Switzerland was the short days. More night.
I pull on some clothes (I'm not affected by the cold as much as others due to my vampirism but I need to fit in) and open my door. Time for my weekly shopping trip. The hardest part would be the last quarter of a mile, when there were too many witnesses to fly and the wind was too strong. But until then it was easy going.
Once I slam the door of my local Casino on the blizzard outside, I sigh and head for the produce aisle. I am largely ignored as I am "the weird one" and I buy only red things, which makes me odd. Looking at the price of some new dark-red lipstick, I ignore the ding of the bell as another customer enters the shop.
"Verkaufen sie kaugummi?" a female voice inquires.
My ears prick up, though my holograph doesn't detect it as I am a peachy-skinned, normal-eared, bite-lacking human to all who see me. I haven't heard this voice before and for a woman who's lived over a thousand years, I have good memory.
"Ja, dort."
"Danke."
The stranger heads where the shopkeeper points. I stay low, my time escaping the Lich still with me in the form of distrust, and watch as the woman go and pick out some gum. Strange that's the only thing she's buying. I take in her pink snow boots, pink snow suit, pink hair...wow this girl likes pink. Her skin is of a very pale, slightly pink, complexion.
She bends down and drops her bag. I barely hear what she says, but I pick up, "...oh Glob..."
Humans don't worship Glob, right?
As I watch, her skin flashes pink for a second before turning pale once more. I'm sure of it now. She's an Escape.
I line up behind her with my bag of red. Sometimes I buy other things, like carrots or bread, but I always feed them to the animals that roam by my house. Not today. I have to talk to my fellow Escape.
Outside, once checking the coast is clear, I turned my hologram off, only for a second. It's enough. She's glimpsed my grey-blue skin, my pointed ears, my bite. When she looks down at my feet, I hover them ever so slightly to prove my point. She laughs.
"It's been so long..." she shook her head, "I haven't seen another...one for such a long time."
"You should come to my house," I say cheerfully, "We could get to know each other."
"Definitely."
We chat our way towards my house, and when we get out of sight I offer her a ride. She accepts and soon I'm a dragon, flying high above the wind tunnel. She laughs with glee.
In my house, I build a fire for the benefit of my guest. Sitting down with two mugs of hot chocolate, I survey my guest as herself.
Her hair is not the normal shape and size that I thought originally, but basically a blob of gum. Her skin is unnaturally pink, but apart from that she could pass as a human. I see her drinking my non-human form. I guess she hasn't seen another Escape in a while.
"So, what do they call you?" I ask, trying to get the ball rolling.
"Bonnibel. Bonnibel Bubblegum. Just call me Bonnie."
"I've heard that before. Were you the new Princess?"
She sighs, "There goes my alias. Yes, I was the Princess. So, who are you?"
"Marceline Abadeer. Half demon, half human, Vampire Queen, vampire hunter."
Bonnie smiles, "You have a lot of titles. What do you go by?"
"Marcy."
We chat for a while. I find out that Bonnie has no family left, but there was none to begin with. I reveal that my human mother died hundreds of years ago but my demon father joined the Lich and was betrayed by him, so I, too, have no family. I find out that Bonnie, too, was alive before the First Mushroom War. She had such high hopes for the Candy Kingdom. It was going to last a thousand years, she said.
"...but I couldn't even bring it to it's first decade..." Bonnie sighs.
"Hey, hey, it's ok." I say, putting my hand on hers, "No-one could defend against the Lich. I know it sounds dark, but the Candy Kingdom held up a lot longer than the Slime kingdom. And my girl LSP, her kingdom crumbled like dust. I should get in touch with her, see how she's handling being smooth."
"Oh, I know where she is!" Bonnie says, "I'm a danger to Escapes, so I don't stay in one place too long. She's in Argentina. I can give you her number and address if you want."
"Oh! Wicked!" I smile. A few seconds pass, and we stare at out enjoined hands. I bring mine back to their rightfull place and rub them in embarrassment. Bonnie smiles bashfully.
"If you were to date someone..." she asks, "would it be a human or an Escape?"
"Escape." I say without a doubt, "I would need to talk about Ooo. I would need to be my true form around them. I wouldn't be comfortable with lying to them day in, day out."
"Oh," Bonnie says, "Do you know of any Escapes living in this area?"
"Umm...no, not since Lady Rainicorn moved to Korea and Mr Cupcake to England."
"Oh," Bonnie reiterates, "Well then, can I meet you at your place tomorrow at 6 o'clock?"
"Definitely." I confirm
Casino isn't an actual casino, but a chain of shops in Switzerland.
Verkaufen sie kaugumm means do you sell gum?
Ja, dorn means yes, there
Danke means thanks
