July Raine

Fear and loving in Tahoe

The rest of the day seemed to move by so slowly. The anticipation was building and it was making me have butterflies in my stomach. I didn't know why this was happening. I shouldn't be so nervous. 

Fooling around with Maddy was one thing, but actually going on a date was another. Even though we loved each other it was a whole new thing now that we were going on a date. I wasn't sure if I knew how to act on a date, especially with someone I really cared about.

I tried not to think about the date, but my family insisted on continually bringing it up. It was a big deal to them. In there mind I hadn't dated in years. I never really told them when I was seeing someone, because it was never serious enough to bring it up. 

I always wanted to keep to myself when it came to my personal life. 

"Melonie isn't it time that you at least start thinking about getting ready." 

I had to skirting around the idea of getting ready for a while, but I didn't want to seem to eager. I didn't want to come off as being desperate. 

I looked at my watch just checking to make sure the time. Three o'clock, I coudln't put it off any longer. 

" I guess I'm as ready as I'll ever be." 

We headed to the bedroom of the cabin. I began looking through my clothes. Some were in the closet, some in the suitcase, and even more in the dresser drawers. I begin to figure out real quick that I did not have anything that I felt was suitable for a first date.

" What am I am going to do, I have nothing to wear."

Bell, just laughed. " Sure you do we just have to look harder. And if all else fails we will raid my suitcase." 

We searched and searched and I still coundn't find anything suited my liking. 

"Mel, I think I might have something in  my pack that I think might could work." 

"Yeah right, you are way smaller than me Bell." 

"Whatever Mel,  you are smaller than you think." 

I rolled my eyes. "You are joking right." 

"Just try it on and then I'll leave you alone about it." 

I didn't want to try it on. I didn't want to to be embarrassed when it didn't fit, but I really wanted her to leave me alone about it. So I tried to squeeze myself into the dress that I knew for sure was too small. 

I watched her smile and I pulled it over my hips, which was a miracle. 

"If you get it zipped it will be a miracle." I was baffled when it zipped right up. 

I looked at her. "There is no way that we wear the same size." 

She laughed a little. "Well, to be honest, I brought it just to you." 

I turned my head and squinted my eyes. " Why?" 

She gave me a devious smile then grinned from ear to ear. 

" I had a feeling that you might be needing it." 

" You knew I'd be going on a date with Maddy." 

" I kind of felt like you would, the way you talked about him."

I just shook my head. I wasn't aware that my feelings were so apparent. I told Bell about Maddy, but I didn't know that it came across as me being so into him. 

It was true though. I loved Maddy, I wasn't sure I'd ever felt this way about anyone. That fact was very sad to me. The fact that I didn't think that I'd even loved July's dad that much. Sometimes I felt like I had an excuse for the realization that we weren't as in love as I thought we were.