The Cuyaniverse Collection

Interlude: Am I the only one thinking this is a bad idea?

Cavalry sighed as she threw the stylus down on the table. No amount of firecrackers was worth fixing Fives's grammar for four kriffing hours.

Despite her brother not knowing the difference between a pencil and a spoon, she had managed to turn his scrawls into some form of an inventory request form. She sighed and leaned back in her chair, stretching and wincing as her bones clacked together.

She stood up and left the room, heading to the barracks to see if she could finally get a decent nap in before the next round of horrors she faced in preparation for Umbara.

She found almost the entirety of Torrent company crowded around her bed. Pushing her way through, she stared at the sight in front of her.

One, Hardcase was sitting on her bunk, her armor scattered everywhere. Two, he had one of her knives poised over his mouth.

As Cav reached out to take it away from him, Neon grabbed her arm.

"Wait, let him do it." He whispered. Cav glanced at him.

"Do what?" She asked. Neon shushed her and pointed. Hardcase lowered the knife to his open mouth, paused, then dropped it straight in. He closed his teeth around the handle, stopping it from falling into his throat.

Cavalry watched, breath bated. Like any respectable clone, she cared about her weapons. Those knives were sharp. She waited for Hardcase to start choking, or fall over dead from cutting his own throat open from the inside out.

Nothing happened.

After a moment, Hardcase raised the spit covered blade out of his mouth. He pulled his cheeks away and made faces at the gathered crowd, showing there were no cuts in his throat.

"And that," He paused for dramatic effect, "Is my hidden talent." He spotted Cav in the crowd and passed the slimy blade back to her. "Here you go, Cav. Thank you."

Every one around them burst into applause. Cav stared at the disgusting knife in horror.

"Out of everyone here, why am I the only one that thinks that was a bad idea?" She muttered to herself.

"Tomorrow, once I convince the general to let me borrow something of his, I will be demonstrating how to swallow a lightsaber." Hardcase announced. Cavalry's heart sank even further.

How was anybody in this company still alive, let alone having all their limbs and braincells. Well, most of their braincells. Actually, the more she thought about it, the more she was sure that they only shared one collective braincell they passed between themselves.

Hardcase certainly did not posses it at the moment.