"You're Alone Kokichi, And You Always Will Be" // A Saiouma Angst Story

Chapter 12 - The Flower On His Desk

Kokichi's POV

One thing I knew was that people knew someone went to the hospital from the sirens, they just didn't know it was me.  So the bullying continued.. every day at school.

The good thing was that me and Shuichi got closer.. but he was still dating Kaede.

I had started to get used to the bullying by now, until Thursday came. When I walked into class that day, everything was fine... until I had looked at my desk.

There was a white flower in a vase, sitting on my desk. I remembered the meaning of that.

White flowers mean that they wished the student was dead..

I felt tears forming in my eyes but I held them back. I sat down and gently moved the vase over onto the window sill that was next to me, careful not to drop it even though I really wanted to.

I wanted to drop it and break it, but I knew if I did, it would bring attention to it and I would get laughed at how badly I'm being bullied.

My heart sunk at just the thought of that. I didn't want others to know how weak and sensitive my emotions really were. I would probably get bullied even more because of it.

I then remembered the razor I kept in my school bag. Maybe just one more cut wouldn't hurt, right? I was trying to stop cutting because Shuichi had told me to, and I really was trying! It was just hard. so.. so hard..

I dug my hand into the front pouch of the bag, it took a while before I finally felt something sharp hit my finger. I hissed through my teeth as the pain shuddered through my hand.

I plummeted the razor into my pocket and raised my hand to go to the bathroom. Almost immediately after my teacher approved I was already in the hallway.

I walked into the first stall I saw and rolled up my sleeve. I began to leave medium sized deep cuts. I usually cut on my forearm and not my wrist to avoid fatal injuries, but this time I decided to cut a bit higher than usual.

I brought the razor up to my wrist. I closed my eyes and ran the metal across the sensitive vein. I regretted it in an instant. I mentally cursed at myself, trying to ignore the pain but not succeeding.

I flushed the toilet (even though there was nothing in it) and walked out. I went to the sink so I could wash the blood off of my wrist, but when the steaming hot water touched the wounds I let out a small yell.

Then I heard someone from the other stall. "Kokichi?" That voice.. it was way too familiar to be a stranger. it almost sounded like-

Rantaro's POV

I was in the bathroom, trying to skip a few minutes of class, when I heard Kokichi yell outside of the stalls. "Kokichi?" I called out. I watched the movement of his feet when he heard me.

He seemed to tense up and freeze. I could have also sworn I heard him choke out a startled sob as well. I opened the door and walked out, the purple hair boy looked scared but also relieved to see that it was just me.

Without warning, he bursted into tears, pulled me into a hug, and started repeating "The bullying, it won't stop none of it will." I was very shocked, knowing I'd never seen him in this state before.

Me and Kokichi had a pretty good friendship in the killing game, we saw eachother as brothers and we still do now as well, so its normal for us to be open with emotions around eachother.

But this time Kokichi seemed to just lose it when he saw me.

"Hey now, listen Kokichi, it's ok. Calm down. What happened?" Kokichi looked up at me with big, wet eyes. I'm unsure if he consciously did this, but he started to vent.

"I-I just want the b-bullying to stop.. I'm so st-*hic*upid for being so rude in the killing game... I-I was just trying to survive.. Why can't a-anyone understand that?!"

I looked at him with sympathy. I was going to calm him down but the bell had rung. I personally didn't care about it since I could go back and get my belongings in the classroom anytime, but Kokichi used it as an excuse to leave.

I guess he thought he was good at hiding it, which most of the time he is, but this time it was just too obvious and I'm pretty sure he only left because he felt embarrassed about opening up like that.

Not too long after Kokichi left, I heard my teacher come into the bathroom. "Amami! Out of the bathroom now! Get to class!" I sighed and headed to my next subject, still worried about Kokichi.

Shuichi's POV

It was lunch time. I felt a bit weird for this, but it was kind of like I was stalking Kokichi now, watching his every move at any time I could.

I mean, I guess it couldn't be that bad right? Kokichi would stalk me all the time in the killing game. I wasn't aware of it at first, but I eventually caught on to it.

But unlike Kokichi, I would only watch him when he was near me. In the killing game he would just always follow me around.. kind of like a psychopath.

Ok, maybe psychopath is too far, because after Kokichi died and I saw the board in his room, I found out I was the only one he trusted. Which made the 'stalking' make more sense.

Kokichi seemed to notice what I was doing, way more quicker than I thought he would. He teased me about it too.

"Shumai has a crush! Shumai has a crush!" He would giggle, fully aware that Kaede was right behind me and him. She didn't seem to mind though, she laughed at it too.

It was almost like she didn't see us as a couple and only friends. Which made me sad... but if I was being honest.. I was kind of losing feelings towards her.

My interest was now aimed at Kokichi, no matter how many times I tried to deny it or look for someone else, it wouldn't work. My attention always ended up focusing on him. And I can't stop thinking about it.

Kaede's POV

I knew Shuichi had a crush on Kokichi. It was obvious. Too obvious. I don't know if it was just me or if actually was easy to see but I know fully well he most likely has some sort of attraction towards him.

And I don't mind it at all. To be honest, I liked him at first, but now I like Miu, so I'm unsure of what to do. Maybe I should just break up with him.

He would understand right? After all he's going through the same thing and I can tell our relationship impacts Kokichi even though he doesn't show it.

Poor boy, doesn't even know how to stand up against his bullying. He thinks no one has noticed it.. but its running gossip around the school. Its spoken of.. just not loudy.

He went from being the bully to becoming the bullied. And the flower on his desk proves it.

1292 words! Ok ok I know this chapter is actually written terribly and I haven't updated in a while but don't worry I still have a bunch of ideas for this story! I will make sure to get the next chapter out as soon as possible :D