Dysphoria Extra Scenes

05: The Kiss

Alternate Scene #1:
for some of you, if you read dysphoria within the first 1-3 months of publishing, this was the regular scene. However, I ended up changing it after. When Wilbur died I wanted it to be emotional, and the kiss felt... forced and cheesy. I didn't want this book to be like every other wattpad cliche LOL, so I ended up changing it. This was the original for those who didn't see it.
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"Okay I will admit, do you know what this button is?" Wilbur asked, turning around to face his dad.

Phil nods, arms crossed over his chest. "Uh huh, yeah I do."

"Have you heard the song? The one scribbled on the walls? I was just saying that there was a special place, but it's not there anymore," Wilbur chuckled dryly. He looks around him, seeing the song of his home scrawled on the walls, a song that wasn't even true anymore.

What was L'manberg now?

"It is there you've just won it back, Will," Phil said, taking a few steps forward, hoping to pull his son away.

"I'm always so close to pressing this button, dad. I've been here, like seven or eight times," Wilbur sighs, seeing the spot on the floor where he used to sit just thinking about blowing it up. This place has no meaning to him anymore, L'manberg was never going to be recovered.

"And you want to just blow it all up?"

Wilbur nods, recalling his deal with Dream. "I do, I do."

"You fought so hard for this land back, so hard."

"I don't even know if it works Phil," Wilbur shrugged, fingers reaching out to brush it. "I don't. I could press it and it might not work."

"Do you really wanna take that risk?" Phil asked, standing right behind Wilbur.

"There was a saying Phil by a traitor," Wilbur smiles sadly, "it was never meant to be."

"Wilbur, wait!" You screamed, finally breaking through the layer of Blackstone he placed in front of his room, but it's too late. His hand slams against the button and Phil grabs him, wrapping him in his wings as the city he built is torn apart.

The force of the explosives shake the ground you're standing on, throwing you against the wall. It's loud,  but what's even louder is the screams of everyone as the explosion tosses them around.

Their screams are full of fear, pain and sadness.

Tommy is perhaps the loudest, ripping through the air and it sounded like pure heartbreak, but then there's Dream.

His sounds like pure madness, a crazed looks in his eyes as he screams out in triumph with Techno.

"Oh my god, you didn't," Phil said, looking over at the giant crater that was still exploding.

You lean against the wall, barley supporting yourself. Blood trickles down the side of your head, and there's a ringing in one of your ears but you keep yourself awake.

"My L'manberg Phil!" Wilbur shouted, "My unfinished symphony, forever unfinished, if I can't have this, no one can."

"Oh my god," Phil gasped, watching as everyone stumbles around, gathering their senses once again.

"Phil, kill me. Kill me Phil, grab this sword and stab me," Wilbur said, tossing his sword at him.

Phil doesn't take it, shaking his head. "What?"

"Do it! Look they all want you too."

"You're my son!" He protests, stepping back.

"Phil, kill me!"

"Wilbur-," you cry out, reaching for him.

Phil shakes his head, "No matter what you do, I can't-"

Wilbur bangs his hands against the stone, "look! Look how much work went into this and now it's gone. Do it."

"Phil, please," you beg, still stumbling and it's the first time they realize you're there.

Wilbur looks at you, and there's a flash of pain in his eyes, but then Phil grabs the sword and plunges it through him.

In that moment, your entire world fell apart. Phil steps back as your rush forward, a new found strength inside of you.

"No," You gasp, "no, please, no."

Your legs fold from beneath you, knees scraping the rough stone next to him. The sword is stuck in his chest, blood quickly pooling around him. You take his head gently in your hands, laying it on your lap as your tears fall. This was too much, it was all too much, you can't do this.

Wilbur gives you a loopy smile as you brush the hair out of his face, a smile you hadn't seen in a while. Did it really take death to bring it?

"Hey, don't cry."

"Wilbur, Wilbur, I-"  you place your hands on his wound, blood soaking his shirt as you try to desperately save him.

His shaky hands land on top of yours, grasping them and your attention.

"I can't lose you too," You sob, looking away from his tired eyes.

"You'll be okay."

Your breath is shaky, you're trying to fight yourself to fight the pain and the sense of impending doom, but you know he won't make it. You know this is the end, this is where the line is drawn. Wilbur was going to die and you would be left alone in this world.

Did you ever get a happy ending? Was there ever a change you get to win? You close your eyes, tears spilling onto Wilbur's shirt and you finally look at him, saying words you should've said long ago.

"I love you, Wilbur. I love you so, so much, please don't go."

His hand comes up to your face, cupping your cheek as tears fall from his eyes, "I love you too."

You shake your head, how could he love you? How could he possibly say that when he's dying in your arms? He's leaving you alone with all this pain, it shouldn't hurt as much as it did. Reality was, Wilbur died a long time ago.

"Then don't, please don't go."

"That's not my call."

You bite your lip, bending your head as you try not think about the last few moments with him.

"Kiss me," He said suddenly, voice shaking.

"What -?"

"I want my last memory to be of you."

"Wilbur-,"

"Please."

You can't deny him, you never could. If this is his dying wish, you were going to be the one to listen.

"I love you Wilbur Soot," you said, grabbing his face in your hands. You can already see the light dimming from his eyes, his breathing slow but he speaks.

"I love you so much, (Y/N) (L/N) and I will always be with you."

You nod, kissing him with as much love as you can muster, trying to convey every word you couldn't say into a single action, he returns it with just as much fever, your lips fitting like two puzzle pieces.

By the time you pull away, he's gone.

You sit back, his blood covering your hands and shirt.

He was dead.

Everything happens at once and you let out a heart wrenching sob, doubling over and grabbing your chest as you struggle to breathe.

This wasn't fair, you couldn't do this.

None of this, all the pain, the grief, no amount of time in the world could heal your wounds. You'd be broken for the rest of you life, nothing would ever feeling right again.

How do you put something back together if all the pieces are gone?

A gentle hand settles on your shoulder and Phil kneels beside you, taking you in his arms, broken wings and all.

— END —