Drown Out My Thoughts

Happy Ending

[This is it..] he thought. [It's finally over. I'm finally free.] He closed his eyes as he felt his body relax. There were no longer any bubbles floating up to the surface. Remus had stopped choking on the water. The fight was over.
Or so he thought.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Janus woke up and noticed Remus was missing from his usual spot next to him. He thought it strange but didn't make much of it until he looked over and saw a note on the nightstand. Hurriedly he picked it up and read the following:

Hi DeeDee. I'm really, really sorry. I'm so sorry. I couldn't take it anymore. They were too loud. So, I decided to drown them out. Normal people usually write notes for this sort of thing so I decided to be normal for at least one time before I died. I love you. I leave my heart to you, I ripped it out and left it in a jar in the closet before I left. :}) You're amazing. You're like the sun, except you don't melt my skin off when I go near you. I'd still like you anyways. Anyways, I'm sorry. I'm in the pool if you're looking for me. I love you. I'm so sorry.

Remus

"Oh god, Remus.." Janus muttered as a sob started to work its way up his throat. He quickly sunk outside and found Remus's lifeless body floating in the pool. "No!" Janus cried out, running to him. He dove into the pool, time seeming to slow down as he struggled to get Remus out of the shackle.
When he was finally released, Remus was dragged to the surface and hoisted up onto the side of the pool by Janus, who started to perform CPR like his life depended on it, because it did.
Janus had started to give up hope when he heard a sudden gasp come from Remus, followed by choking. He quickly turned him on his side so he stopped choking; allowing the water to escape his lungs.
  After it seemed that Remus was finished Janus grabbed him and held him tight. "Oh god, Remus. Never do that again, you hear me? I thought I had lost you." His voice cracked at the end as he let out a sob and held Remus impossibly tighter.
  The only words Remus could manage in Janus's vice-like grip was, "I'm sorry."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After Remus had gotten a shower and dried off, Janus sat him down to talk. "Remus..." he tried to start, but he was at a loss of words. He could only look helplessly into his partner's sad, guilty eyes.
  Remus slid closer to him on the bed, interlocking their fingers together. Janus didn't mind, he appreciated being able to feel Remus; to know he was still there and still alive. That thought alone nearly sent him into tears again.
  After a few more moments of silence he finally spoke up, "I'm not mad. And you don't need to apologize to me. For anything."
  Remus looked up at that, seemingly on the verge of tears. "I just want you to know that I love you, that I don't know what I'd without you. Please, Remus. Please promise me you'll stay with me."
  Remus stayed silent but he gave a small, tearful nod as he stared down at their hands. Janus kissed the top of his head and leaned his own against Remus's.
  They still had a lot to work through, and it'd take some time for Remus, and Janus, too, to heal from this, but they knew they were going to be okay.