First and probably last chapter i write on my Laptop F.
Anyways time to rip out your hearts eh? General TW for this chapter because well... ill rip out your hearts ^^.
will i give them back at the end? who knows.
Lets go <3
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Cold.... abandoned..... Peaceful.... Tranquil....
those are the words Yoongi would use to describe this place.
The city's lights shining, glimmering in the distance as the wind ruffles trough his black hair, the brown roots showing only slightly trough the now faded dye-job.
He breathed out, the fog that was once stuck in his lungs evading his body.
He never smoked.... not anymore and yet here he was.
Clothed in a black t-shirt that did little to keep the cold winds from biting at his exposed skin, the scars visible turning a purple-blueish color from the cold.
He was having a deja vu, thinking back to when he was a young boy, barely 14 when his father shattered his first mixing console and with it his dreams of becoming a music producer, back then he had also sat on a roof, smoking, trying to forget his useless existance only now he was someone to be recognized, he was Suga, The Suga from BTS a now world renowned band and yet....
yet he was sitting on a roof in seoul, a half-smoked pack of ciggarettes next to a bottle of some cheap alcohol he had fround, next to a lighter, next to a forgotten blade.
Drip....
Drip....
Drip....
The small puddle opf blood kept getting progessivly bigger with each drop of blood dripping from his arm, he hadnt slit his wrist again, well at least not with the intent of ending it that way.
Deaths lullaby was ringing in his ear, her voice akin to a siren's, luring him closer to her arms, she wished to embrace this creation of her sister, promising to take his burdens and let him watch from her domain as his loved ones lived the life they deserved....
A life without him.
He was beyond saving.... he felt it.
The one he had been ran too far away for him to catch now.
SUGA, August D, Gloss, Min Yoongi of BTS.... every single one of his personas was gone.
Who was he? did he know?
Do people know he exists? do they care?
They dont
You're no-one, you can finally give up, leave in peace.
Who is he? Min Yoongi, a victim.
Why does he exist? He doesn't.
Will they care that he died? Maybe.
Can they change the fact that he's gone? No.
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(again contemplating to just stop here lul, also stream Daywalker bitches)
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He looked into the distance once again, Seoul was beautiful at this time of night, he sighed and threw the now extinguished bud of his cigarette off the building, reaching over he grabbed a new one and lit it with practised ease, taking a drink from the bottle of booze before also dropping it.
He looked at the rusty razor blade, dried blood already on its edges, he contemplated for a secong before grabbing it and sliding it over his arms a few times more, it didnt do anything no, he had become numb a long time ago, all he felt was a slight presence ghosting over his skin as it parted, revealing veins and blood drops as his body tried to mend itself together....
After the blade was flung away just like the bottle and bud, he put the lit cigarette between his lips inhaling the smoke, it wouldnt matter if this had any health-effects it was supposed to have he wouldn't be around to deal with those after all.
Memorys played in his head, images flashing infront of him as he found himself smiling slightly at some of them.
Jimin laughing,
Jungkooks puppy eyes as he dragged yoongi to come cuddle,
Taehyungs boxy smile on their first tour,
Hoseoks laughter as he and yoongi goofed off while dancing,
Jin and him cooking for the other members,
and of course late nights in his studio with namjoon.
His smile fades as he remmebers everything thats happened to him in the last months, trials, assult, suicide, coma, kidnapping.... continuously being used until he broke....
Everything had flared up again after the police stormed that god-forsaken house he had been held in....
he could've sworn he died that day and well... he did,
At least the part of himself that made him, well himself, Min Yoongi had died in that basement and nothing could bring him back.
The body walking trough the streets, attending intense therapy sessions that ended in nothing, coming home to 6 boys he once called his life, it was nothing more than a shell of a human, he was thankful for being a natural at acting.
Smiles as they made pillow forts, had movie nights, passionate moments, friendly banter.
They tought he was getting better, recovering once again like he had before, only he knew the truth, he couldnt recover, not anymore....
He felt loved, he knew they would miss him, he knew he was hurting them by doing this but death was calling him like an old friend, he knew it was his time to answer her song with his own melody, to finish the piece that had started 28 years prior, ending the unfinished symphony that had been his life.
Would it be finished after all this time?.
He smiled dropping the cigarette snagged between his lips looking as it fell to the ground, he breathed out one last time.
Strings snagged his arms trying to hold him in this world, his attachments, memorys of his boys, memorys of all the happy things trying to hold him back from leaving this realm.
It didn't matter, he could feel death calling him to her, and so...
He finally gave into her embrace, accepting that he would no longer be able to go back....
Deaths embrace wasn't cruel, no it was warm and welcoming allowing him to look over the life he had lived, looking back onto the memorys he didnt wish to loose as tears slipped down his face, the salty liquid drops burning his frozen cheecks as he left this realm to join Death in her domain and watch over those he left behind.....
Min Yoongi Died that night in that basement but his body died the night he jumped off that roof...
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Hand over your hearst right now,
so yeah thats the story, its done and finished, after almost 2 years.... this is the first story i've ever written thats ever gotten this much support and i cant thank every single one of you enough for sticking by me for this journey.... i love you ^^
Theres a discord btw ^^ : https://discord.gg/PdNJApnHYt
Join me and some others in being dumbasses <3
so yeah this is it, ill start a new fic now perhaps, maybe here or maybe on ao3 im not sure yet but yeah... till then
(also stream Daywalker :P)
Love you, stay safe bonbons
-Liyra <3
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Fading away || {Yoongi x BTS}
Fanfiction"Yoongi stop making so many mistakes" That's isn't what Hoseok said but his brain sure made it sound like that "Just fucking stay in your studio and rot in there until you die" Isn't even close to what Namjoon has said but his depression infused br...
