love on the horizon

I Swear

It gets late, but Ernie doesn't dare move, so Ernie ends up falling asleep on the couch in the upright position, head lolled backwards and supported by the backboard of the couch. His legs fell asleep a long time ago, but this opportunity is too good to pass up, so Ernie simply ignores the desire to move his numb legs. Ducky remains in place by Bert's feet, snoring away. Ernie feels all fuzzy inside at the domestic setting while he slowly loses consciousness.

Bert stirs at about 4:00 AM, which sends shockwaves through Ernie's very numb nerves. He jumps awake to see Bert all sweaty with his eyebrows knitted, but eyes still closed. His legs are in so much discomfort, though, that he can't take it anymore, and lifts Bert's head gently in order to stretch his legs out. The pins in needles in his legs drive him crazy, but he nonetheless sets Bert's head back down on his now straight legs. The move jostles Bert into opening his eyes, where the first thing he sees is Ernie. 

Immediately, Bert's smiles grows wide, and his sleepy eyes are practically hearts. He murmurs something nonsensical in his fever-dream state, and then continues to stare at Ernie with those love-filled eyes. Ernie's heart swells to a height he's never felt before, and it causes Ernie to laugh at how cute this usually very cynical guy is being. His cheeks are flushed, and he's panting, and he's probably in a lot of pain and hallucinating, but he's so, so cute. Bert likes this reaction, because he immediately reaches up to hug Ernie's waist and then nuzzles into his stomach, once again closing his eyes. 

Ernie's stomach cannot stop flipping. Every time he thinks about what just happened, his stomach feels like there's a hurricane inside of it. It's 4 am, but Ernie suddenly has enough energy to run a marathon. Due to his ADHD tendencies, Ernie also gets an impossibly strong urge to bounce and fidget to release this energy. He can't, though, because he absolutely cannot disturb Bert. But he can't just sit still, he feels like he's about to combust. He can't move his legs, or make loud noises, or turn on any lights, because Bert is his number one priority. At first, he settles for fidgeting with one of his sister's old hair-ties that he had put on his wrist (he felt a pang of loss as he imagined her teasing him over how much he's losing his shit over this, but the butterflies and energy still wouldn't go away. in his head, he silently vents to his sister about his feelings right now, but that only lasts so long before he feels more sadness at the realization that all her "replies" are made up in his head). Soon, though, that isn't enough, and he begins to pick at his nails. After making 8 of his 10 nails bleed, he moves on to biting the inside of his cheeks. Every time his energy begins to dissipate, he thinks of the moment again, and he's right back to needing to fidget. 

Thirty minutes later, Bert stirs again. A little moan escapes his lips, and Ernie can't help but completely flush, even though he knows it was a moan of pain. Y'know, due to the very high fever. Bert turns and opens his eyes blankly. For a couple seconds he just stares at Ernie with absolutely no recognition in his eyes. But then he does recognize Ernie, and for some reason tears come to his eyes, and he's back to smiling that adorable smile. In his croaky voice, he speaks.

"I love you so much." Ernie blinks in confusion.

"What?"

"I'm in love with you. I want to be your boyfriend for the rest of my life."

"What???" 

"Just needed to remind you. I've been head over heels since you dated that girl in college."

Tears snaked their way down Bert's face before he closed his eyes again. In truth, Bert had just had the wackiest fever dream about him and Ernie dating. In the dream, he and Ernie had become lovers, and were growing old together. They had a tumultuous relationship, and kept breaking up and getting back together. He had to sit there and watch as Ernie got cancer, and then died in his arms. He felt such a great sense of loss that when he opened his eyes and saw a young Ernie staring down at him, he was overjoyed. He wasn't entirely sure what was going on, but he needed to take this opportunity to express to Ernie, the love of his life, now in the flesh and brighter than ever, everything going through his head before he regretted it and the wobbly flow of time whisked him off again. As soon as he got everything off his chest, he opened his eyes again and he was a child eating dinner at his house with his parents. The wobbly ocean of time swelled again, and Bert resigned himself to bobbing in the waves.

Ernie was floored. Absolutely, entirely floored. He ran through every possible way he could have misinterpreted that statement, and he came up with nothing. There is nothing more explicit and unmistakable as "I'm in love with you." He tried writing it off as just something Bert said in his feverish state, but nobody simply makes stuff like that up with absolutely no feelings attached. Maybe, Bert mistook his feelings of gratitude over Ernie caring for him right now, and the only strong friendship Bert had ever had, and in his feverish state blew them out of proportion. Maybe Bert was working through his sexuality and could only picture Ernie as someone trusted enough to experiment with before coming down from his fever and going back to being straight. Maybe he was roleplaying as Abby back when Bert wasn't getting any attention from Ernie. Maybe Bert had picked up on Ernie's feelings for him and felt obligated to reciprocate. Or, maybe, undeniably maybe, Bert had feelings for him too. 

Considering that Ernie had never even imagined a possibility of Bert liking him back, just the thought made him giddy. He was grinning like an idiot as the words replayed in his mind again and again. He began to daydream about a world where he finally gained the courage to confess and they had a relationship. 

He could imagine sleeping in the same bed as Bert, and Bert waking him up as he heads off to do something. He could sleepily pad over to the kitchen where Bert was cooking, lean over, and kiss him good morning. Maybe Bert would hold the small of his back and press him closer as they kissed. Or maybe he'd let Ernie glom onto him, hugging him from behind as he cooked. Maybe they could walk to classes together, and then duck into empty halls or bathroom stalls to make out real quick. He could come back to the apartment to see Bert making dinner, Ducky right there, and see Bert's eyes light up and greet him with a kiss. They could snuggle on the couch and watch whatever they wanted together, and he could fall asleep hearing Bert's heartbeat. In general, this fantasy wasn't all that much different from normal. But, there was that little spark of love that romance brought that painted everything rosy. That, and they would have tons of sex. Everywhere. Ernie would make sure of it.

At some point in imagining all this sex, Ernie's head lolled back onto the back of the couch, and he once again was sleeping with Bert on his lap.