Happiness [GakuenBabysitters]

Chapter 4 feelings

I must be the most damned man on earth, "you have got to be kidding me"
"I knew that i was trying to take care of him from a distance but i din't mean that i would see him with her on a date"
I was only in the cafe for a minute when i saw the loving couple enter, i cringed to myself after so i cursed under my breath no one could hear it except for myself. I was lucky that the chair was high enough so that he couldn't see me it was like those modern cafe's where they have little booths with the tables in the middle. The chair were so high that i knew he wouldn't be able to see me, he is the type of person who can only focus on one thing and being oblivious to his surroundings. Once i was done with my dinner i saw that the girl excused herself to the restroom and i decided that it would be a great time to bolt out of there. I got up and walked past him and his younger brother, i got a glimps of his eyes, his big beautiful hazel eyes. Heat started on my neck then on my cheeks he couldn't have noticed because i wore a face mask that covered my chin to almost my eyes.
I took my time to stand outside there for a moment just looking around since i had nothing better to do. When i decided that to go home it seems like i bumped into the couple they were walking home hand in hand like they were on those stupid romance movies together. A bitter taste was on my tounge but then a thought occurred to me

"How would it feel to hold his hand?"...
"He probably wouldn't like it anyways"
I thought to myself while looking down at my hands
"Nah he wouldn't like it" i reassured myself

I walked home in silence head held down only looking at my feet, hearing only laughter from the 2 people in front of me.
We walked down a small alley that eventually opened up to a street of our neighborhood i choose the opposite side of the street just so that they don't notice me.
they arrived at Kashima's house and i saw him set down his bag on his front porch and walk her home, i din't bother and just walked down to my house opened up my hoodie, pocketed my mask and went inside.

After that i went straight to my room showered, the image of them walking infront of me laughing was still on my head. I clicked my tounge but carried on anyways, after i got to the shower i put on some clothes and went to my room. I was staring at the floor for a good 4 minutes when i decided to look through my phone i opened many things my gallery which had a only one thing in them, phyiscs formula's. After that i opened my dm's and only had Kashima in there.
A sudden ache in my heart was present
I din't know what it was but i din't like it. I closed my phone plugged the charger and went to bed.

Kashima's POV

I din't think much of Kamitani who was standing just 2 houses away, i waved at him with a smile. But he just walks in the house with his usuall deadpan face, i know i was used to his cold attitude but i couldn't help to be hurt a little today by him
I haven't talked to him in a while i was too focused on her and kotarou..

I tried shruged of the thought and did it very well because i got through the night without thinking of Kamitani or Her.
It was a pathetic but the reason im still going on with this cold and sad life is because of Kotarou with his warmth and smile.

The next day i was taking care of the kids like usual but at lunch it was the only time that i have with kamitani just the two of us without my girlfriend
But i dont get it. why din't he show up today... I stood there at the daycare doors. I sat down alone and not a minute later my girlfriend deciced to join me in the daycare room we chatted like usual and told each other jokes while i took care of the children, like always usaida was fast a sleep a bubble coming out of his nose.

Kamitani's POV

I find myself eating lunch and breaktime alone since kashima got his girlfriend it felt like things wasn't how they're supposed to be.

Only the two of us

I had went to the toilet after lunch had started. After so i decided to help Kashima out in the daycare room since he's gotta be there where else can he be...
As i approached the daycare i heard laughter.. A familiar laughter it was faint because i was still at the hallways but i knew where i've heard that before and i was right

I saw them chatting and laughing, his laugh only his laugh was enough for me, the sound he made from his soft laugh was soothing, the smile on his face was contagious causing me to grin a little

But he isn't smiling because of me

I thought to myself, the slight grin that was on my face disappeared as i walked away from the daycare..

Kashima's POV

Time skip to 1 month later

It was the usual nothing special but our second date came a little late because we had too many homework, schoolwork and projects, no time for dates but now that's over and we planned our second date at the same cafe that we had our first date.. The day was sunday so it was the perfect day to have a date i thought to myself

Time skip to date

Nothing really differed from last time except Kotarou was not with us saikawa had insisted on taking care of kotarou

"Ryuuichi-Sama today i will take care of Kotarou the chairlady said that you need to have Quality time with your loved one just the two of you"

"Eh? But i don't want to bring any more work to your plate saikawa-san"

"It is fine i insist on this By myself also"

"Well since you already insist there is no stopping you. So thankyou very much"

I was lost in my thoughts for a good 5 minutes before

"Ryuu-kun?"

"Ah oh yes?"

"Are you worried about Kotarou"

"... Yes"

"Oh well im sure he will be fine"

"I know but i cant help but worry"

'What if i lose him? what if something bad happens and im not there to protect him? What will my parents think of me?

I don't want to be alone dont leave me Kotarou

I was lost in my thoughts again but this time i was visibly panicking

She put her hand on mine and smiled at me a concerned and worried smile
She told me to not worry about it and try to loosen up.
After we had our meals i noticed she had a distant look in her eyes as she stared to the window

"Are you okay?" I asked

"Oh its nothing. Shall we get going now?"

"Oh un lets go"

We ended out date like last time went home hand in hand and i walked her to her house

I got back to our front porch. nostalgia hit me in the face as i looked over to kamitani's house. But snapped back soon later after noticing he wasn't there

I went inside the house and greeted saikawa, obaa-san and Kotarou i excused myself to bed since i already had dinner and got ready. Took a shower brushed my teeth and got to kotarou. After we were ready kotarou decided a book he wanted me to read it was his favorite as usual 'The Teary Panda' im still suprised that he isn't tired of it by now considering many times i've read it to him after i tucked kotarou to bed
I heard a notification from my phone

Ryuu-kun Tommorow after school can we talk?

A/n
Sorry to leave you guys like this but the first few chapters can be easily predicted tho i wouldn't worry much but i promise things are gonna go more interesting from the next chapter