Runaways and Stolen Beanies

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Liam opened his hotel door to see Louis practically in tears. He had an inside out hoodie unzipped over his bare chest and was wearing flannel pyjama pants. 

"Harry ran away," Louis said, his eyes so wide that Liam could see white circling all the way around Louis's blue irises. 

Liam took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Louis," he started to explain, "Harry can't run away- he's an adult. He just needed time alone." 

"No, Liam!" Lou said, raising his voice in frustration, "He ran away. And who knows what he's going to do on his own?" 

"Louis." Liam said calmly. "Harry is an adult." 

"But he's sick," Louis said, tugging at his sweater sleeve anxiously. 

Liam saw Louis' concern and softened. "I'm sorry, Lou," he said. "One day won't make anything worse though- he'll have a day to himself and then we can get help him with whatever he needs when he comes back, okay?" 

Louis went back to his room reluctantly, leaving Liam alone to think. He was almost positive he knew where Harry would be hiding, but he wanted to give him some time to himself. 

***

A few hours later, Liam gently pushed open the door to the dressing room. He saw Harry sitting in the corner on the floor, in a pair of grey sweatpants, his now-faded HIPSTA PLEASE t-shirt, and a grey knit beanie that looked like one Louis used to wear. He was surrounded by empty fast food wrappers and was about halfway through a burger when he saw Liam. He set the buger down when he saw him. 

Liam crouched down on the floor facing Harry. "You don't have to hide to eat, you know," Liam said gently. "You've been starving yourself- of course your body gets hungry." 

Harry didn't look up at Liam. "But its so much food," he said quiety. "I ate so much, Liam, it's disgusting." 

Liam sat down cross legged and Harry finally made eye contact with him. "Do you think we'd love you any less if we saw you eating like this?" he asked. "Because I've seen Niall eat, like six burgers in one sitting and I'm still so happy to be his friend. I don't think you need to worry about, what... three?" he asked, looking at the wrappers around Harry. "Your body's screaming at you to eat right now, Harry," he said. "Your body knows what it needs okay? There might be a little voice in your brain that confuses you sometimes, but your body knows how to keep you alive and it wants you to eat, okay? want you to eat." 

Harry nodded, but Liam could see he was starting to cry. 

"There's just so much," Harry said, starting to sniffle as he tried to hold back the tears. 

"It's really not that much food," Liam said. "If you want, I can go pick up some burgers for myself and eat them to show you its okay? I know Louis says that helps." 

Harry shook his head. "I just meant there's so much, so much of me," he said. He was crying a lot now and the words tumbled out.

"Harry," Liam said gently, "You deserve to take up space."

Harry held onto his knees and rocked himself gently.

Liam ached seeing Harry like this. It really seemed like the more upset Harry got the less space he wanted to take up... sitting on the floor in the corner,  curled up in a ball... Liam reached out and wrapped his friend in a tight hug, patting him on the back softly.

"Do you want me to go get Louis for you?" Liam asked, "he's been worried sick about you all day."

"He doesn't care," Harry said, rubbing his eyes and pulling away from Liam.

"I don't think you mean that," Liam said, "he's been an amazing friend to you."

Harry sighed and pulled his beanie down over his ears, "Yeah because he has to."

"Louis cares about-"

"Not the same way I do, okay?" Harry said, his voice rising. 

Liam sat in the silence for a moment before he responded. "If you have feelings for Louis, you need to tell him, Harry. He'd be really supportive of you, I promise." 

"I don't-" Harry started. "It's not like-" and he hid his face behind his hands, knowing he couldn't even deny it right now. 

"Look," Liam said. "The bond you two have... it would be crazy not to think that at least one of you would get feelings for the other. Just... can I ask you something?" 

Harry nodded. 

"Do your problems with food have anything to do with Louis? With you thinking Lou isn't interested in that way?" 

"No," Harry said, his eyebrows raising in surprise at the thought. His problems with food had been around since before the band, and they got worse from stress, but never from Lou. "And please don't tell Lou, I've been trying to get over it for years, I just need a bit more time."

"Well then I think you need to tell him," Liam said, standing up and stretching out his legs. "I'm going to go back to the hotel now- I know you wanted your space." 

Harry nodded tugging at his beanie, which he'd stolen from Lou's that morning. 

"But Harry?"

"Yeah?" he asked. 

"You really should think about going back to your room soon, Lou's been panicking all morning." 

Harry sighed, and deciding to do the right thing, he got up to follow Liam out of the dressing room, nervous to talk to Louis. 

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