Maybe one day? - Spencer Reid x Reader

Chapter 39.

You walk into the building, you're already confused about what's going on. You've been away too long that it's almost become weird to be walking into work but nevertheless you try to appear cheerful, appear happy but you can feel yourself slipping. This is going to be hard, you know they'll see through it. You wonder if Spencer will, but he had felt you, had witnessed the worst and the absolute deep depths of you, you knew he'd figure it out so instead you decide to profile him, you're going to do what you do with unsubs. You aren't going to let him figure it out, figure you out.

Despite dressing up and making yourself appear confident you were anything but. You keep your head up as you walk, your heels click against the floor as you walk into the BAU floor, the elevator door closes behind you and you're thankful you have your headphones in as you needed the boost, you needed the confidence the music was giving you.

You pause the music, you take the earphones out and put them into your bag and take a deep breath. You had this right? You could do this but then you hear his laugh, his chuckle and all the resolve slips away and you wish you could go hide, stay in bed and cry the day away. It wasn't like it was when someone you dated briefly rejected you, there had been feelings. Things you had felt, the night when you stayed awake trailing patterns on each others body's as you spoke about the things that haunted you in the depths of your dreams.

So you decide to do what any bad ass does, you ignore him. You put your bag over your shoulder, put your phone into your hand with your coffee and stride into the bullpen. You see Spencer talking animatedly with Morgan, you can see Emily sitting at her desk but the others aren't anywhere to be found.

Here goes. You think to yourself.

"Morning everyone!" You chirp as you walk near your desk. You look to Morgan who whistles when he sees you.

"Now it is, welcome back angel." He smiles at you, teeth bared. You look to Spencer who is looking at you with his eyes wide, he wants to see how you're going to be. You know it so you decide to be the bigger person. "I hope you missed me baby." You laugh and shake your head.

"Of course I did Morgan." You reply back as you place your bag and cup down at your desk.

"Morning Y/L/N." Prentiss says as she waves at you from her desk, she gives you a knowing smile before looking back at her computer.

"Morning Em." You smile at her but you can feel Spencer's eyes on you still. "Morning Dr. Reid." You don't wave, you don't smile but you briefly hear the quiet morning that he utters. As you finish setting up your desk Garcia enters the bullpen.

"Morning my loves, Y/N you look lovely!" Her smile is always welcome, she comes over to give you a slight hug which you do back.

"Why thank you, you're a cutie aren't you today?" You giggle as Garcia laughs. "I missed you."

"Yeah and don't you forget it okay?"

"Never would." You chuckle as you sit down at your desk. You notice Emily looking at you opposite you. "What's up?"

"It's nice to see you back. Did the other day help?" Emily says while typing on her computer. She then gets up from her desk and motions for you to go with her. You turn on your computer before you stand up, remembering to grab your coffee with you.

"It did thank you." You take a sip of your coffee while you follow her to the printer, the bullpen is practically empty apart from a new agents walking through the bullpen to get their offices. It's a quiet morning and you notice Hotch in his office and wondered if JJ and Rossi were here yet.

"Apart from the other night, what else have you gotten up too before coming back?" Emily questions as she rustles through some folders next to the printer, paperwork was absolutely everywhere at times.