Hawks X Fem reader Oneshots

Hired For Part 7

"I need you to focus dove, please, you need to calm down"

The pressure of arms around me was oddly comforting. It felt like it was all that was holding me together. The file slipped out of my hands curling my arms over the arms around me. 

"See the feather?"

Infront of me was a Scarlett feather. I nodded slowly.

"What color is it?"

I found my voice, strained and shakey as I tried to focus, "Red"

"Good. Now take a slow deep breath with me"

We matched our breathing forcing me to slowly calm down. As the anxiety slowed to a simmer a new emotion found its way in.

"I trusted you!" I shove him off me facing Hawks directly.

"I understand, you're angry, I need you to finish calming down first" his hands reached out to me but I flinched away.

I don't want him to touch me. Once he does I'll shatter. Hot tears ran down my face. This room was too small but too large. I was trapped but everything was so far away. My breathing was ragged trying to get enough oxygen.

Hawks pursued me trying to pull me into a hug. I started out fighting but he didn't take no for an answer holding me close.

"I hate you!" I try to pull from him but it is weak compared to him. He doesn't let me go forcing me still.

"I know... you can hate me all you want. Just be ok first. You need to calm down. This will pass"

My whole body went from rigid to lax in a second. Hawks slowly moved us to the floor still not letting go moving me to bury my head in his chest.

"I thought I could trust you" I sobbed through hiccups

"I know. I never meant to hurt you" he laid a soft peck on my hairline before resting his head over mine

"I should have died"

"You lived. You shouldn't take that for granted"

"I watched her suffocate...I couldn't unbury her fast enough"

"There was nothing you could do"

"A cloth... if she just had a cloth over her mouth"

"Don't dwell. It'll only hurt more" Hawks voice was soothing. He continued to mutter apologies and kind words to me.

By the end of it all I felt mentally drained. My eyes stung from crying and all I wanted to do was go to bed and hide under the covers. 

"I...want to go home..."

"I don't want you driving like this"

"I just want to go home" I mutter

"I'll drop you off, sound good?"

I could only nod. Everything just felt wrong now. I wanted an escape.

Hawks POV

I took her home leading her straight towards her room. If she saw her plants it could make her feel worse.

She seemed like a porcelain doll. I could move and manipulate her how I wanted but she is so fragile one wrong movement could break her.

I got her on her bed and wrapped her up in blankets like a sushi roll. Crawling up there myself I leaned against the wall and pulled her to lean against my chest.

Rubbing her arms and holding her could only do so much but she seemed a little better. I pulled out my phone and started looking for something to stream off of it.