Vocaloid Short Stories

?'s Book of Rants

Two janitors are cleaning up a hallway when or of them notices a book.
Janitor 1:Hey look what I found!
Janitor 2: What is it?
The two open the book.
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Rant 1: Kids
So, I have always had a thing against these modern kids, like nine year olds and ten year olds.
They always try to be so mature. In fifth grade, kids started dating and wearing makeup, and I'm like holdup, when were you all 16 year olds. Instead of dating, focus on your studies. Instead of wasting your time applying makeup, flipping do something useful.
II've seen kids as young as young as kindergarten holding a cellphone, when all they do is go to school and go home. I had to earn my cell, and didn't get it until 8th grade. What does a kid who does nothing need a cell phone for?
Seriously.
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Rant 2: The Arts
So, as a vocaloid, I am so inclined to enjoy the arts. I prefer band and performing arts over chorus, though.
So anyway, in band I play two instruments. I practice 8 hours a week outside of school. I sound good.
But there are kids in my class who practice less than an hour total each week. And they sound horrid. SERIOUSLY, THEY RUIN THE BAND. WHY DO THEY PRACTICE SO LITTLE? THEY DON'T HAVE AN EXCUSE. THEY PROBABLY LAY AROUND ALL AFTERNOON INSTEAD OF PRACTICING. LIKE, PRACTICE.
And then there is the matter of acting. So, I study my lines, making sure I know them to the downright letter. I walk into class to watch the other group perform. It hurts. The group was awesome except for one girl who didn't know any of her lines. We had an extra week, and she didn't even memorize her lines.
I PRACTICE AROUND 11 HOURS A WEEK ON MY THREE INSTRUMENTS COMBINED. I ALSO SCORE STRAIGHT A'S AND TAKE CARE OF MY PET, MAINTAIN MY ROOM, AND DO DISHES, AS WELL AS GIRL SCOUTS AND A CLUB. I MEMORIZE MY LINES. WHY DOESN'T SHE MEMORIZE HERS?!?
Seriously.
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Rant 3: Attention Lovers
So, I have a friend who only talks to me when another friend is around, or there is an entire group of people. She loves attention. To draw attention to herself, she always talk about her divorced parents. She whines and searches for sympathy. She doesn't understand how easy her situation is. She isn't abused, she has a roof over her head, as well as a full stomach. She has free rights.
It'd be normal if she talked about it occasionally. NO, SHE CONSTANTLY TALKS ABOUT IT, AND IS SO OVERDRAMATIC. SHE NEEDS TO THINK ABOUT HOW GOOD HER LIFE ACTUALLY IS.
Seriously.
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Rant 4: Beauty
So, girls nowadays are obsessed with their outward appearance. They waste an hour applying makeup and styling their hair. However, sensible girls don't do this.
They say they want to feel pretty, but they are really being pretty for someone else. They don't look like this at home. I'm sure at home they ddon't wear makeup and sit around in sweat pants.
What angers me is how skinniness matters. In America, a good portion of our population is obese or chubby. Though people act as if the chubby ones are reviled, the truth is most skinny girls are. I am a healthy skinny, I eat quite a bit, and have a thigh gap. People seem to look down on me for it. Because I maintain healthy eating habits and exercise habits.
Feminists seem to think that girls can be any size they want to be. That is correct. Girls can be slightly chubby, curvy, or muscular as they want to be. However, I feel like obesity is being promoted. They say, oh, don't listen to others, anyone who looks at you based on size is wrong. But when you are obese, things get serious. WE NEED TO WORRY ABOUT OBESITY FOR GOODNESS SAKE. WHY DO WE AMERICANS SEEM TO IGNORE IT?

Seriously.
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Try to guess which vocaloid this is in the comments. Whoever gets it right will have a chapter with a story they decide upon.